What can be sadder to me than
miseries so various as these should emaciate me while ye are alive.'"

SECTION XX

"Draupadi said, 'Alas, on account of that desperate gambler, I am now
under Sudeshna's command, living in the palace in the guise of a
_Sairindhri_. And, O chastiser of foes, behold the plight of poignant
woe which I, a princess, am now in. I am living in expectation of the
close of this stated period.[14] The extreme of misery, therefore, is
mine. Success of purpose, victory, and defeat, as regards mortals, are
transitory. It is in this belief that I am living in expectation of the
return of prosperity to my husbands. Prosperity and adversity revolve
like a wheel. It is in this belief that I am living in expectation of
the return of prosperity to my husbands. That cause which bringeth on
victory, may bring defeat as well. I live in this hope. Why dost thou
not, O Bhimasena, regard me as one dead? I have heard that persons that
give may beg: that they who slay may be slain; and that they who
over-throw others may themselves be overthrown by foes. Nothing is
difficult for Destiny and none can over-ride Destiny. It is for this
that I am awaiting the return of favourable fortune. As a tank once
dried, is filled up once again, so hoping for a change for the better, I
await the return of prosperity. When one's business that hath been
well-provided for is seen to be frustrated, a truly wise person should
never strive for bringing back good fortune. Plunged as I am an sorrow,
asked or unasked by thee to explain the purpose of these words spoken by
me, I shall tell thee everything. Queen of the sons of Pandu and
daughter of Drupada, who else, save myself, would wish to live, having
fallen into such a plight? O represser of foes, the misery, therefore,
that hath overtaken me, hath really humiliated the entire _Kuru_ race,
the Panchalas, and the sons of Pandu. Surrounded by numerous brothers
and father-in-law and sons, what other woman having such cause for joy,
save myself, would be afflicted with such woe? Surely, I must, in my
childhood, have committed act highly offensive to _Dhatri_ through whose
displeasure, O bull of the Bharata race, I have been visited with such
consequences. Mark, O son of Pandu, the pallour that hath come over my
complexion which not even a life in the woods fraught as it was with
extreme misery, could bring about. Thou, O Pritha's son, knowest what
happiness, O Bhima, was formerly mine.