nts a slug, two f'r a
quarther--durin' the war; an' it was th' same price afther the war. The
day befure th' crime iv sivinty-three it was worth fifteen cints: it was
worth th' same th' day afther. Goold and silver fluctuates, up wan day,
down another; but whisky stands firm an' strong, unchangeable as th'
skies, immovable as a rock at fifteen or two f'r a quarther. If they
want something solid as a standard iv value, something that niver is
rajjooced in price, something ye can exchange f'r food an' other
luxuries annywhere in th' civilized wurruld where man has a thirst,
they'd move th' Mint over to th' internal rivinue office, and lave it
stay there."

Both Mr. Larkin and Mr. McKenna were diverted by this fancy.

"There's some good argumints on both sides iv th' quisthion," said the
Kerry man. "I heerd a man be th' name of Doyle, a helper, compare money
to th' human lungs."

"Th' lung argumint is all right," said Mr. Dooley. "Th' whole currency
question is a matther iv lungs."

ON POLITICAL PARADES.

Mr. Hennessy, wearing a silver-painted stovepipe hat and a silver cape
and carrying a torch, came in, looking much the worse for wear. The hat
was dented, the cape was torn, and there were marks on Mr. Hennessy's
face.

"Where ye been?" asked Mr. Dooley.

"Ma-archin,'" said Mr. Hennessy.

"Be th' looks iv ye, ye might have been th' line iv ma-arch f'r th'
p'rade. Who's been doin' things to ye?"

"I had a currency debate with a man be th' name iv Joyce, a towny iv
mine, in th' Audjiotoroom Hotel," said Mr. Hennessy. "Whin we got as far
as th' price iv wheat in th' year iv th' big wind, we pushed each other.
Give me a high glass iv beer. I'm as dhry as a gravel roof."

"Well," said Mr. Dooley, handing over the glass, "ye're an ol' man; an',
as th' good book says, an ol' fool is th' worst yet. So I'll not thry to
con-vince ye iv th' error iv ye'er ways. But why anny citizen that has
things in his head shud dhress himself up like a sandwich-man, put a
torch on his shoulder, an' toddle over this blessid town with his poor
round feet, is more than I can come at with all me intelligence.

"I agree with ye perfectly, Hinnissy, that this here is a crisis in our
histhry. On wan hand is arrayed th' Shylocks an' th' pathrites, an' on
th' other side th' pathrites an' th' arnychists. Th' Constitution must
be upheld, th' gover'mint must be maintained, th' down-throdden farmer
an' workin'man must get their rights. B