shelled and bulleted and barbed-wire fenced. A bullet from a
Spanish gun, entering the stomach of an American soldier, turned black
when it came in contact with the embalmed beef there, and poisoned the
brave soldier, and made him die, with thoughts of home, and mother,
and sweetheart, and his lips closed for the last time, silent as to his
wrongs, uncomplaining as to the murder committed by the millionaires
at home. The business of packing meat ought to be combined with the
undertaking business, so you could order your meat and your coffin from
the same man. By cracky! Boy, I am so mad when I think of it, that I
don't want to go to heaven if those people go there. Go out, dears, for
a minute, for I want to use language that you can't find in the school
books!" and Uncle Ike got up out of his chair, pale with anger, and
smashed his pipe on the stone hearth, and a tear rolled down his cheek.
"Why, Uncle Ike, I didn't mean to make you cry," said the red-headed
boy, as he backed out of the room, frightened at the old man.

"Well, never mind, boy; don't worry about your Uncle Ike, because at my
age, when a man gets mad clear through, he has to have vent, or bust,"
and the old fellow laughed as hearty as though he had never been mad
in his life. "But I have a tender spot for soldiers who go to fight for
their country, and when they are abused I feel that somebody is guilty
of treason. I was a soldier in the war between the North and South, and
have seen soldiers hungry, so hungry that they would take raw corn out
of the nosebags of mules that were eating it, until a mule would begin
to kick seven ways for Sunday when he saw a soldier coming; but it
couldn't be helped, because the government couldn't keep up with the
soldiers with rations, when they were on the jump night and day. But,
do you know we had fun all the time we were hungry? There were Irish
soldiers in my regiment who would keep you good natured when you were
ready to die. The Irish soldier is so funny and so cheerful that he
should have good pay. If I was going to raise a regiment, I would have
one Irish soldier, at least, to every seven other soldiers, and my Irish
boy would keep them all laughing by his wit, so they would stand any
hardship. I have seen an Irish boy parch his corn that he had stolen
from a mule, spread it out on a saddle blanket in four piles, go and ask
three officers to dine with him, and, when they sat down on the ground
to eat the parched c