at you mean is you're really an individual very like
the rest of us, subject, if I may say so, to the common desires,
weaknesses and prejudices of humanity--and not a damned freak.

JOHN (_brightly_). That's rather good, that is. If it's a question of
the Zoo, what I say is--what price home? Now, homes _are_ extraordinary
if you like--I don't know whether you've ever noticed it. School--you
can understand school. But home--! Strange things happen here while I'm
away.

TRANTO. Yes?

JOHN. It was while I was away they appointed Dad a controller. When I
heard--I laughed. Dad a controller! Why, he can't even control mother.

HILDEGARDE (_without looking round_). Oh yes he can.

JOHN (_pretending to start back_). Stay me with flagons! (_Resuming to_
Tranto.) And _you're_ something new here since the summer holidays.

TRANTO. I never looked at myself in that light. But I suppose I _am_
rather new here.

JOHN. Not quite new. But you've made a lot of progress during the last
term.

TRANTO. That's comforting.

JOHN. You understand what I mean. You were rather stiff and prim in
August--now you aren't a bit.

TRANTO. Just so. Well, I won't ask you what you think of _me_, John--you
might tell me--but what do you think of my newspaper?

JOHN. _The Echo_? I don't know what to think. You see, we don't read
newspapers much at school. Some of the masters do. And a few chaps in
the Fifth--swank, of course. But speaking generally we don't. Prefects
don't. No time.

TRANTO. How strange! Aren't you interested in the war?

JOHN. Interested in the war! Would you mind if I spoke plainly?

TRANTO. I should love it.

JOHN. Each time I come home I wonder more and more whether you people in
London have got the slightest notion what war really is. Fact! At
school, it's just because we _are_ interested in the war that we've no
time for newspapers.

TRANTO. How's that?

JOHN. How's that? Well, munition workshops--with government inspectors
tumbling all over us about once a week. O.T.C. work. Field days.
Cramming fellows for Sandhurst. Not to mention female masters.
'Mistresses,' I ought to say, perhaps. All these things take time.

TRANTO. I never thought of that.

JOHN. No. People don't. However, I've decided to read newspapers in
future--it'll be part of my scheme. That's why I was reading _The
Echo_. Now, I should like to ask you something about this paper of
yours.

TRANTO. Yes.

JOHN. Why do you let Hilda write those