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Title: The Title
A Comedy in Three Acts
Author: Arnold Bennett
Release Date: June 22, 2004 [EBook #12687]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ASCII
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_The Title_
A COMEDY IN THREE ACTS
BY
ARNOLD BENNETT
LONDON
CHATTO & WINDUS
MCMXVIII
CHARACTERS
MR. CULVER
MRS. CULVER
HILDEGARDE CULVER } their children
JOHN CULVER }
TRANTO
MISS STARKEY
SAMPSON STRAIGHT
PARLOURMAID
ACT I
An evening between Christmas and New Year, before dinner.
ACT II
The next evening, after dinner.
ACT III
The next day, before lunch.
The scene throughout is a sitting-room in the well-furnished West End
abode of the Culvers. There is a door, back. There is also another door
(L) leading to Mrs. Culver's boudoir and elsewhere.
ACT I
ACT I
Hildegarde _is sitting at a desk, writing_. John, _in a lounging
attitude, is reading a newspaper_.
_Enter_ Tranto, _back_.
TRANTO. Good evening.
HILDEGARDE (_turning slightly in her seat and giving him her left hand,
the right still holding a pen_). Good evening. Excuse me one moment.
TRANTO. All right about my dining here to-night? (Hildegarde _nods_.)
Larder equal to the strain?
HILDEGARDE. Macaroni.
TRANTO. Splendid.
HILDEGARDE. Beefsteak.
TRANTO. Great heavens! (_imitates sketchily the motions of cutting up a
piece of steak. Shaking hands with_ John, _who has risen_). Well, John.
How are things? Don't let me disturb you. Have a cigarette.
JOHN (_flattered_). Thanks. (_As they light cigarettes_.) You're the
first person here that's treated me like a human being.
TRANTO. Oh!
JOHN. Yes. They all treat me as if I was a schoolboy home for the hols.
TRANTO. But you are, aren't you?
JOHN. In a way, of course. But--well, don't you see what I mean?
TRANTO (_sympathetically_). You mean that a schoolboy home for the hols
isn't necessarily something escaped out of the Zoo.
JOHN (_warming_). That's it.
TRANTO. In fact, wh
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