ration: PERFECT LADY]

CHAPTER XV

RACE

All the Families agree that the tenants of the Globe should be of one
uniform shade.

[Illustration: MILL-RACE]

Each Family, however, thinks that his own particular shade is the only
fitting one for the Perfect Human Being.

To that end he spends a large part of his time in scheming how to get
rid of all the other tints.

All of which is a great waste of centuries! Old Tempus the Janitor has
always settled the Tint question with his Solar Stove and always will.

A week at the seashore in August ought to convince anyone of the
efficiency of the Solar Tint Factory. In the tan of the surf bather is
locked up the secret of Race Colouration.

[Illustration: BLACK-RACE]

And yet there are some Great and Wise Ones who believe that Civilization
(with the assistance of Mr. Marconi and Mr. Rolls H. Royce and a few
others) will bring the Race Families into such close relationship that
they will eventually be all blended into one harmonious Neutral Tint!

A pale mauve World! One tint, one religion, one food, one dress, one
Drink, one everything.

How appalling! And think of the moment when it is to be decided once and
forever which it is to be--Blonde or Brunette!

Oh those Wise and Great Ones!

[Illustration]

CHAPTER XVI

GOVERNMENTS OF THE GLOBE

The best definition of Government may be found in Wordsworth's lines:

_"The simple plan_
_That they should take who have the power_
_And they should keep who can."_

In every community on Earth, the strongest, the craftiest or the
wealthiest of the male inhabitants conspire to compel their weaker,
stupider or poorer brothers and sisters to pay them for the privilege of
remaining on earth.

Government by the Strongest is called an Absolute Monarchy.

Government by the Craftiest, a Limited Monarchy.

Government by the Wealthiest, a Republic.

In an Absolute Monarchy, the People are Controlled.

In a Limited Monarchy, they are Cajoled.

In a Republic, they are Sold.

For the successful operation of Limited Monarchies and Republics, it is
necessary to delude the Common People into the belief that they are
managing their own affairs.

[Illustration]

This is accomplished by means of a House of Lords, Congress, Chamber of
Deputies, Diet, Cortes, Assembly, Soviet, Etc.

These merry contrivances are designed on the principle of the revolving
squirrel-cage, furnishing harmles