y five weeks.

FIRST PALLBEARER

Well, a man is lucky if he goes off quick. If I had _my_ way I wouldn't
want no better way.

SECOND PALLBEARER

My brother John went thataway. He dropped like a stone, settin' there at
the supper table. They had to take his knife out of his hand.

THIRD PALLBEARER

I had an uncle to do the same thing, but without the knife. He had what
they call appleplexy. It runs in my family.

FOURTH PALLBEARER

They say it's in _his'n_, too.

FIFTH PALLBEARER

But he never looked it.

SIXTH PALLBEARER

No. Nobody woulda thought _he_ woulda been the next.

FIRST PALLBEARER

Them are the things you never can tell anything about.

SECOND PALLBEARER

Ain't it true!

THIRD PALLBEARER

We're here to-day and gone to-morrow.

(_A pause. Feet are shuffled. Somewhere a door bangs._)

FOURTH PALLBEARER

(_Brightly._) He looks elegant. I hear he never suffered none.

FIFTH PALLBEARER

No; he went too quick. One minute he was alive and the next minute he
was dead.

SIXTH PALLBEARER

Think of it: dead so quick!

FIRST PALLBEARER

Gone!

SECOND PALLBEARER

Passed away!

THIRD PALLBEARER

Well, we all have to go _some_ time.

FOURTH PALLBEARER

Yes; a man never knows but what his turn'll come next.

FIFTH PALLBEARER

You can't tell nothing by looks. Them sickly fellows generally lives to
be old.

SIXTH PALLBEARER

Yes; the doctors say it's the big stout person that goes off the
soonest. They say typhord never kills none but the healthy.

FIRST PALLBEARER

So I have heered it said. My wife's youngest brother weighed 240 pounds.
He was as strong as a mule. He could lift a sugar-barrel, and then some.
Once I seen him drink damn near a whole keg of beer. Yet it finished him
in less'n three weeks--and _he_ had it mild.

SECOND PALLBEARER

It seems that there's a lot of it this fall.

THIRD PALLBEARER

Yes; I hear of people taken with it every day. Some say it's the water.
My brother Sam's oldest is down with it.

FOURTH PALLBEARER

I had it myself once. I was out of my head for four weeks.

FIFTH PALLBEARER

That's a good sign.

SIXTH PALLBEARER

Yes; you don't die as long as you're out of your head.

FIRST PALLBEARER

It seems to me that there is a lot of sickness around this year.

SECOND PALLBEARER

I been to five funerals in six weeks.

THIRD PALLBEARER

I beat you. I been to six in