een one!

You do not remember what we were talking of? what _you_, rather, were
talking of? And what _I_ remember, at least, because it is exactly the
most unkind and hard thing you ever said to me--ever dearest, so I
remember it by that sign! That you should say such a thing to me--!
think what it was, for indeed I will not write it down here--it would
be worse than Mr. Powell! Only the foolishness of it (I mean, the
foolishness of it alone) saves it, smooths it to a degree!--the
foolishness being the same as if you asked a man where he would walk
when he lost his head. Why, if you had asked St. Denis _beforehand_,
he would have thought it a foolish question.

And you!--you, who talk so finely of never, never doubting; of being
such an example in the way of believing and trusting--it appears,
after all, that you have an imagination apprehensive (or
comprehensive) of 'glass bottles' like other sublunary creatures, and
worse than some of them. For mark, that I never went any farther than
to the stone-wall hypothesis of your forgetting me!--_I_ always
stopped there--and never climbed, to the top of it over the
broken-bottle fortification, to see which way you meant to walk
afterwards. And you, to ask me so coolly--think what you asked me.
That you should have the heart to ask such a question!

And the reason--! and it could seem a reasonable matter of doubt to
you whether I would go to the south for my health's sake!--And I
answered quite a common 'no' I believe--for you bewildered me for the
moment--and I have had tears in my eyes two or three times since, just
through thinking back of it all ... of your asking me such questions.
Now did I not tell you when I first knew you, that I was leaning out
of the window? True, _that_ was--I was tired of living ...
unaffectedly tired. All I cared to live for was to do better some of
the work which, after all, was out of myself, and which I had to reach
across to do. But I told you. Then, last year, for duty's sake I would
have _consented_ to go to Italy! but if you really fancy that I would
have struggled in the face of all that difficulty--or struggled,
indeed, anywise, to compass such an object as _that_--except for the
motive of your caring for it and me--why you know nothing of me after
all--nothing! And now, take away the motive, and I am where I
was--leaning out of the window again. To put it in plainer words (as
you really require information), I should let them do what