, because then all
the world returns to town. Farewell, my kind, faithful Wegeler! Rest
assured of the love and friendship of your

BEETHOVEN.

15.

TO COUNTESS GIULIETTA GUICCIARDI.[1]

Morning, July 6, 1800.

MY ANGEL! MY ALL! MY SECOND SELF!

Only a few words to-day, written with a pencil (your own). My residence
cannot be settled till to-morrow. What a tiresome loss of time! Why this
deep grief when necessity compels?--can our love exist without sacrifices,
and by refraining from desiring all things? Can you alter the fact that you
are not wholly mine, nor I wholly yours? Ah! contemplate the beauties of
Nature, and reconcile your spirit to the inevitable. Love demands all, and
has a right to do so, and thus it is _I feel towards you_ and _you towards
me_; but you do not sufficiently remember that I must live both _for you_
and _for myself_. Were we wholly united, you would feel this sorrow as
little as I should. My journey was terrible. I did not arrive here till
four o'clock yesterday morning, as no horses were to be had. The drivers
chose another route; but what a dreadful one it was! At the last stage I
was warned not to travel through the night, and to beware of a certain
wood, but this only incited me to go forward, and I was wrong. The carriage
broke down, owing to the execrable roads, mere deep rough country lanes,
and had it not been for the postilions I must have been left by the
wayside. Esterhazy, travelling the usual road, had the same fate with eight
horses, whereas I had only four. Still I felt a certain degree of pleasure,
which I invariably do when I have happily surmounted any difficulty. But I
must now pass from the outer to the inner man. We shall, I trust, soon meet
again; to-day I cannot impart to you all the reflections I have made,
during the last few days, on my life; were our hearts closely united
forever, none of these would occur to me. My heart is overflowing with all
I have to say to you. Ah! there are moments when I find that speech is
actually nothing. Take courage! Continue to be ever my true and only love,
my all! as I am yours. The gods must ordain what is further to be and shall
be!

Your faithful

LUDWIG.

Monday Evening, July 6.

You grieve! dearest of all beings! I have just heard that the letters must
be sent off very early. Mondays and Thursdays are the only days when the
post goes to K. from here. You grieve! Ah! where I am, there you are ever
with me; how ear