A--shall want some trousers." _Snip_. "Yes, sir, thank you, sir. How
many would you like?" _Small Swell_.--"A--don't know exactly.
S'pose we say twenty-four pairs; and look here! Show me some
patterns that won't be worn by any snobs!"

viii. Cockney Flunkey,--(_Country Footman meekly inquires of London
Footman_)--"Pray, sir, what do you think of our town? A nice place,
ain't it" _London Footman (condescendingly_). "Vell, Joseph, I likes
your town well enough. It's clean: your streets are hairy; and you
have lots of rewins. But I don't like your champagne, it's all
gewsberry!"

ix Cockney Cabby (_with politeness_).--"Beg pardon, sir; please
don't smoke in the keb. sir; ladies do complain o' the 'bacca
uncommon. Better let me smoke it for yer outside, sir!"

x. Military Cockney.--_Lieutenant Blazer (of the Plungers)_.--"Gwood
gwacious! Here's a howible go! The ifan [? word not legible] v's
going to gwow a moustache! _Cornet Huffey_ (whose face is
whiskerless). "Yaw don't mean that! Wall! there's only one
alternative for us. We must shave!"

xi. Juvenile Low Cockney.--"Jack; Whereabouts is Amstid-am?" _Jack._
"Well, I can't say exackerley, but I know it's somewhere near
'Ampstid-'eath!"

xii. Cockney Domestic.--_Servant girl_--"Well, mam--Heverythink
considered, I'm afraid you won't suit me. I've always bin brought up
genteel: and I couldn't go nowheres where there ain't no footman
kep'."

xiii. Another.--_Lady._ "Wish to leave! why, I thought, Thompson,
you were very comfortable with me!" _Thompson (who is extremely
refined)_. "Ho yes, mum! I don't find no fault with you, mum--nor
yet with master--but the truth _his_, mum--the _hother_ servants is
so orrid vulgar and hignorant, and speaks so hungrammaticai, that I
reely cannot live in the same 'ouse with 'em--and I should like to
go this day month, if so be has it won't illconvenience you!"

xiv. Cockney "Waiter.--"'Am, sir? Yessir? Don't take anything with
your 'am, do you, sir?" _Gentleman._ "Yes, I do; I take the letter
H!"

xv. Cockney Hairdresser.--"They say, sir, the cholera is in the
Hair, sir!" _Gent (very uneasy)_. "Indeed! Ahem! Then I hope you're
very particular about the brushes you use." _Hairdresser._ "Oh, I
see you don't nunderstand me, sir; I don't mean the 'air of the 'ed,
but the _h_air _