the soul may be very fascinating, but somehow they aren't
the kind a man looks for when he invites a girl out to dinner or for a
spin in his automobile.

AN OLD maid is an unmarried woman who has more wrinkles than money.
There is nothing like a halo of gold dollars to keep a woman attractive
to a green old age.

THE things for which there is "the devil to pay," are the only sort
which most men seem to consider really worth the price.

AS a soul-companion, the main difference between a bulldog and a husband
is that the dog can't talk--and the husband won't.

A MAN loves a woman first tenderly, then madly, then dearly, then
comfortably, and last dutifully.

[Illustration]

SOME men are born for marriage, some achieve marriage; but all of them
live in the deadly fear that marriage is going to be thrust upon them.

DISTANCE lends enchantment; but too much distance between husband and
wife is sure to end by one or the other of them finding another
"enchantment."

IN THE mathematics of matrimony two plus a baby equals a family; two
plus a mother-in-law equals a mob; and two plus an affinity equals--a
divorce.

IT IS something of a shock to the sweet girl graduate who has spent her
youth in digging up the Latin roots, studying the Greek forms and
acquiring a working knowledge of French, German and Hebrew, to discover
that the only language her lover really appreciates is baby talk.

[Illustration]

WHEN a man tells his wife that he is "sorry" about anything he has done
he doesn't mean that he's sorry he did it, but that he's sorry she found
it out.

FLIRTATION is like a pink tea, harmless but not exciting; love is like a
dinner with seven kinds of wine, satisfying and exhilarating but apt to
leave you with an uncomfortable feeling that you ought to have stayed
away from it.

A MAN'S wife is something like his teeth, in that he seems to be aware
of her presence only when it becomes annoying or painful.

ONE advantage in being a married man is that you are not haunted by the
harrowing suspicion that every pretty single woman you meet may have
matrimonial designs upon you.

[Illustration]

A MAN'S sentiment is like cologne; he always offers you the cheap kind
in large quantities.

A FEW years with the "George Washington" type of husband, who goes about
with a hatchet and is too honest to flatter his wife, must make her long
for a nice, comfortable companion like Ananias.

BEING clever at repartee means b