ue this is certainly a
clever invention on KARL'S part.

***

We feel that the public need not have been so peevish because the
experimental siren air-raid warning was not heard by everybody in
London. They seem to overlook the fact that full particulars of the
warning appeared next morning in the papers.

***

A man who obtained two hundred-weight of sugar from a firm of
ship-brokers has been fined ten pounds at Glasgow. Some curiosity
exists as to the number of ships he had to purchase in order to secure
that amount of sugar.

***

A London magistrate has held that tea and dinner concerts in
restaurants are subject to the entertainment tax. This decision will
come as a great shock to many people who have always regarded the
music as an anaesthetic.

***

The no-tablecloths order has caused great perturbation among the
better-class hotel-keepers in Berlin. Does the Government, they ask
sarcastically, expect their class of patron to wipe their mouths on
their shirt-cuffs?

***

The chairman of the House of Commons' Tribunal complains that while
cats drink milk as usual they no longer catch mice. This however may
easily be remedied if the FOOD-CONTROLLER will meet them halfway on
the question of dilution.

***

The public has been warned by Scotland Yard against a man calling
himself Sid Smith. We wouldn't do it ourselves, of course, but we are
strongly opposed to the police interfering in what is after all purely
a matter of personal taste.

***

The bones of ST. GEORGE have been discovered near Beersheba in
Palestine by members of our Expeditionary Force. This should dispel
the popular delusion which has always ascribed the last resting-place
of England's patron saint to the present site of the Mint.

***

"War bread will keep for a week," stated Mr. CLYNES for the Ministry
of Food. Of course you can keep it longer if you are collecting
curios.

***

It is announced that all salaries in the German Diplomatic Service
have been reduced. We always said that frightfulness didn't really
pay.

***

German women have been asked to place their hair at the disposal of
the authorities. If they do not care to sacrifice their own hair
they can just send along the handful or two which they collect in
the course of waiting in the butter queue.

***

_Hamlet_ has been rendered by amateur actors at the Front, all scenery
b