ut the Kaiser says:
'Now do as I tell you, Max. I got a wireless from Mexico that Hillkowitz
will carry three hundred and nine out of four hundred and thirteen
election districts in the Borough of Richmond alone.' And Hindenberg
says: 'Where did they get _that_ dope? I tell you they don't know
nothing but Hylan down on Staten Island, and if you take _my_ advice,
Chief, you'll 'phone Ludendorff to hold the Siegfried line, the
Lohengrin line, the Trovatore line, the Travvyayter line, the Bohemian
Girl line, and all the other lines from Aida to Zampa, because in my
opinion Mitchel has a walk-over.'"

"That's where they both made a mistake," Abe commented, "because it was
a landslide for Hylan."

"_Yow_ they was mistaken," Morris said. "Do you suppose for one moment
that the Kaiser had got so much as an inkling that they were going to
elect a mayor in New York? _Oser!_ And with this here Hindenberg, you
could tell from the feller's face that for all he understands about the
English language, Abe, the word _mayor_ don't exist at all. As for the
way they choose a mayor in America, that _grobe Kerl_ couldn't tell you
whether they _elect_ a mayor, _appoint_ a mayor, or _cut_ for a
mayor--aces low. And that's the way it goes in New York, Abe. They think
that the whole of Europe is watching with palpitations of the heart to
see who is going to be elected mayor of New York, and they never stop to
figure that there ain't six persons out of the six millions in New York
which could tell you the name of the mayor of London, Paris, Berlin,
Vienna, St. Petersburg, or, for that matter, Yonkers or Jersey City."

"From the mayor which they finally chose in New York, Mawruss," Abe
commented, "a feller needn't got to be so terribly ignorant as all that
to suppose that not only did the people of New York, instead of voting
for mayor, _cut_ for him, aces low, y'understand, but that they also
turned up the ace."

"They turned up what they wanted to turn up, Abe," Morris said, "which
the way the people of New York City elects Tammany Hall every few years,
Abe, it makes you think that everybody should have a vote, except
convicts, idiots, minors, Indians not taxed, and people that live in New
York City."

X

POTASH AND PERLMUTTER ON REVOLUTIONIZING THE REVOLUTION BUSINESS

If Kerensky would have had experience as a traveling salesman it
wouldn't hurt him to be spending his entire time commuting between
Moscow and Petersbur