, I passed my time
very agreeably in several English and some French families, where, in a
little time, I became quite intimate, saw a great deal of company, and
was treated with the utmost politeness and regard; yet, in the midst of
these pleasures, many a melancholy sigh would rise at the remembrance of
my beloved S--, whom, for several years, I could not recollect without
emotion; but time, company, amusements, and change of place, in a great
measure dissipated these ideas, and enabled me to bear my fate with
patience and resignation.

"On my last arrival at Paris, I was surrounded by a crowd of professed
admirers, who sighed and flattered in the usual forms; but, besides
that my heart was not in a condition to contract new engagements, I was
prepossessed against them all, by supposing that they presumed upon
the knowledge of my indiscretion with S--; and therefore rejected their
addresses with detestation and disdain; for, as I have already observed,
I was not to be won but by the appearance of esteem, and the most
respectful carriage; and though, by a false step, I had, in my own
opinion, forfeited my title to the one, I was resolved to discourage the
advances of any man who seemed deficient in the other.

"In this manner my lovers were one by one repulsed, almost as soon as
they presented themselves, and I preserved the independence of my heart,
until I became acquainted with a certain peer, whom I often saw at the
house of Mrs. P--, an English lady then resident at Paris. This young
nobleman professed himself deeply enamoured of me, in a style so
different from that of my other admirers, that I heard his protestations
without disgust; and, though my inclinations were still free, could not
find in my heart to discountenance his addresses, which were preferred
with the most engaging modesty, disinterestedness, and respect.

"By these never-failing arts, he gradually conquered my indifference,
and gained the preference in my esteem from Lord C-- and the prince of
C--, who were at that time his rivals. But what contributed more than
any consideration to his success was his declaring openly, that he would
marry me without hesitation, as soon as I could obtain a divorce from
my present husband, which, in all probability, might have been easily
procured; for, before I left England, Lord -- had offered me five
thousand pounds if I would consent to such a mutual release, that he
might be at liberty to espouse one Miss W