houldn't he? I'm a little new to the business,
you see, and it _does_ strike me--but never mind. When am I to trot
him off?

_Miss P._ As soon as you can induce him to go--to-morrow, if possible.

_Podb._ I don't believe he'll _go_, you know, for one thing!

_Miss P._ (_demurely_). I think you will find him open to persuasion.
But go and try, Mr. PODBURY.

_Podb._ (_to himself, as he withdraws_). Well, I've let myself in for
a nice thing! Rummest way of treating a proposal _I_ ever heard of.
I should just like to tell that fellow RUSKIN what I think of his
precious ideas. But there's _one_ thing, though--she can't care about
CULCHARD, or she wouldn't want him carted off like this.... Hooray, I
never thought of that before! Why, there he is, dodging about to find
out how _I've_ got on. I'll tackle him straight off.

[_CULCHARD and PODBURY meet at the head of the staircase,
and speak at the same moment._

_Culch._ Er--PODBURY it has }
occurred to me that we might-- }
} leave this place to-morrow!
_Podb._ I say, CULCHARD, we }
really ought to-- }

_Podb._ Hullo! we're both of one mind for once, eh? (_To himself_.)
Poor old beggar! Got the sack! That explains a lot. Well, I won't tell
him anything about this business just now.

_Culch._ So it appears. (_To himself_.) (Had his _quietus_, evidently.
Ah, well, I won't exult over him.

[_They go off together to consult a time-table._

_Miss. P._ (_on the balcony, musing_). Poor fellows! I couldn't very
well say anything more definite at present. By the time I see them
again, I may understand my own heart better. Really, it is rather an
exciting sensation, having two suitors under vow and doing penance at
the same time--and all for my sake! I hope, though, they won't mention
it to one another--or to BOB. BOB does not understand these things,
and he might-- But, after all, there are only _two_ of them. And
RUSKIN distinctly says that every girl who is worth _anything_ ought
always to have half-a-dozen or so. Two is really _quite_ moderate.

* * * * *

A TOO-ENGAGING MAIDEN'S REPLY.

(_BY MR. PUNCH'S KIND PERMISSION._)

[Illustration]

Yes, I read your effusion that lately got printed,
And at first never guessed there was anything meant.
But when someone suggested that something was hinted,
On your verses some time I reluctantly spent.
They are fair