Leo the
Tenth a book containing the whole art of making gold, received as
recompense a great empty purse, with the words: 'If thou canst make
gold, thou art far richer than I; but herein is a purse wherein thou
mayest put thy gold.'

In the German _Lallenbuch_, as well as other works, we find the story of
the stupid fellow who, coming to the banks of a river, waited long and
in vain until the water should all have rolled by. It is given in the
following form in a very droll collection of jests:[8]

'Rustici cujusdam filius a patre in proximam urbem missus, quum ad
flumen aliquod pervenisset, diu dum integrum deflueret, sicque
transitum praeberet, expectans, tandem ubi continuo aquam fluere
vidit, domum reversus est, de eo quod sibi accidisset, parentibus
conquestus.'

But the story was old, centuries before the monks--for even Horace sums
it up in two verses as one quotes a well-known popular proverb:

'Rusticus exspectat dum defluat amnis: at ille
Labitur et labetur in omne volubilis aevum.'

'The clown awaits until the flood be gone:
It glides and whirls for ages ever on.'

The reader has probably heard of the apocryphal twelfth commandment,
'Mind your own business.' Possibly its existence was suggested by the
discovery of the _first_, told as follows in the _Democritus Ridens_.

'A certain soldier being asked by his pastor what was the first
commandment given by GOD, replied, 'Thou shalt not eat!' At which
answer the priest inquiring what he meant, received for reply that
this was the first command to our first parents relative to the
apple. _Quo audito, Pastor conticuit!_ Which having heard, the
priest was silent.'

Of the same family or parentage is the modern story of the clergyman
who, wishing to preach against the extravagant head-dresses worn by the
women of his congregation, took for a text, 'Top knot come down!'
referring for his authority to Matthew xxiv. 17. In like manner a not
over-learned brother is said to have expounded Genesis, chap. xxii. v.
23, as follows: 'These eight Milcah bear.' This shows us, my brethren,
what hard times they had of old, when it took eight on 'em to milk a bar
(and I 'spose get mighty little at that), when nowadays my darter kin
milk a cow with nary help, as easy as look at her.'

Every one has heard of the Irishman crossing the brook. 'Sure, Paddy, if
ye carry me, don't I carry the barrel of whiskey