an ass?"

"I do not, sir," replied the lad, "but if you are anxious to know, I
will ask your tailor."

The audience laughed heartily, and the examiner, seeing that this time
the laughter was not on his side, congratulated the boy on his wit, and
immediately asked him a few sensible questions, which were answered
respectfully, and proved that the candidate had his subjects as ready
as his wit.

* * * * *

I was once asked to examine the French and German classes of an
important English school.

I wrote to "my lords and gentlemen," saying that my knowledge of German
was not such as to enable me to find fault with other people's.

The governors answered that it did not matter, and I was directed to
proceed to the Examination.

I got over the difficulty by sharing the work and the fees with an able
German, who prepared the questions and corrected the copies.

VIII.

ENGLISH BOYS ON FRENCH COMPOSITION.--"GO AHEAD" IS NOT IN FRENCH
"ALLEZ UNE TETE."--HOW BOYS SET ABOUT FRENCH COMPOSITION.--A WRITTEN
PROOF OF THEIR GUILT.--HOW LARGE ADVERTISEMENTS CAN HELP THEM.--A
STUMBLING-BLOCK CLEARED AWAY.

You have achieved a great success when you have succeeded in getting
into young boys' heads that French is not English replaced by
equivalent words to be found in a dictionary.

This is the way boys generally set about writing a piece of English
into French.

They take the first English word, open their dictionary, and put down
the French word they have found for it (the wrong one, as a rule, if
more than one is given). Then they take the second English word, to
which they apply the same process, until they come to a stop, which
they carefully reproduce in the French (many don't). This done, they
take their blotting-paper, apply it on the copy, rub it hard for a
minute or two, and knock off to enjoy a well-deserved rest.

The amount of blotting-paper used by boys is prodigious. A word is no
sooner written down than it is fixed on the paper by a good hearty
rubbing down. They are afraid it will evaporate if not properly secured
on the paper at once.

* * * * *

Suppose your young pupils have to put into French "I give you."

They will first write _je_, then _donne_. After the English word "you,"
they are referred to a note. They look at this note (many don't), and
see that they must put the pronoun _vous_ before the verb. They