ause I
loves fun; so it has lamed the fellow, and that makes me laugh so. You
talk of your saying good things; I said one of the best things last week
that ever any man said in all the world. It was what you call your
_rappartees_, your _bobinates_. I'll tell you what it was: You must
know, I was in high spirits, faith, so I stole a dog from a blind man,
for I do love fun! so then the blind man cried for his dog, and that
made me laugh; so says I to the blind man, 'Hip, master, do you want
your dog?' 'Yes, sir,' says he. Now, only mind what I said to the
blind man. Says I, 'Do you want your dog?' 'Yes, sir,' says he. Then
says I to the blind man, says I, 'Go look for him.'--Keep it up! keep it
up!--That's the worst of it, I always turn sick when I think of a
parson, I always do; and my brother he {20}is a parson too, and he hates
to hear any body swear; so I always swear when I am along with him, to
roast him. I went to dine with him one day last week, and there was my
sisters, and two or three more of what you call your modest women; but I
sent 'em all from the table before the dinner was half over, for I loves
fun; and so there was nobody but my brother and me, and I begun to
swear; I never swore so well in all my life; I swore all my new oaths;
it would have done you good to have heard me swear: so then, my brother
looked frightened, and that was fun. At last he laid down his knife and
fork, and lifting up his hands and his eyes, he calls out, _Oh Tempora!
oh Mores!_---'Oh ho, brother!' says I, 'what, you think to frighten me,
by calling all your family about you; but I don't mind you, nor your
family neither--Only bring Tempora and Mores here, that's all; I'll box
them for five pounds; here,--where's Tempora and Mores? where are
they?--Keep it up! keep it up!"

END OF PART I.

PART II.

THE FIVE SCIENCES: ARCHITECTURE, PAINTING, POETRY, MUSIC, AND
ASTRONOMY.

{21}This is a small exhibition of pictures. These pictures are placed
here to shew the partiality of the present times. Formerly seven cities
contended for the honour of having Homer for their countryman; but as
soon as it was known these sciences were born in England, the whole club
of Connoiseurs exclaimed against them, saying, it was impossible that
there could be any real genius among them, our atmosphere being too
thick and too heavy to nourish any fine ideas. These sciences, being
found out to be mere English, were treated as impostors; for, as