.

Chichikov was greatly taken aback.

"Oh, that uncle!" bellowed the General in paroxysms of mirth. "Oh, that
blessed uncle! WHAT a fool he'll look! Ha, ha, ha! Dead souls offered
him instead of live ones! Oh, my goodness!"

"I suppose I've put my foot in it again," ruefully reflected Chichikov.
"But, good Lord, what a man the fellow is to laugh! Heaven send that he
doesn't burst of it!"

"Ha, ha, ha!" broke out the General afresh. "WHAT a donkey the old man
must be! To think of his saying to you: 'You go and fit yourself out
with three hundred souls, and I'll cap them with my own lot'! My word!
What a jackass!"

"A jackass, your Excellency?"

"Yes, indeed! And to think of the jest of putting him off with dead
souls! Ha, ha, ha! WHAT wouldn't I give to see you handing him the title
deeds? Who is he? What is he like? Is he very old?"

"He is eighty, your Excellency."

"But still brisk and able to move about, eh? Surely he must be pretty
strong to go on living with his housekeeper like that?"

"Yes. But what does such strength mean? Sand runs away, your
Excellency."

"The old fool! But is he really such a fool?"

"Yes, your Excellency."

"And does he go out at all? Does he see company? Can he still hold
himself upright?"

"Yes, but with great difficulty."

"And has he any teeth left?"

"No more than two at the most."

"The old jackass! Don't be angry with me, but I must say that, though
your uncle, he is also a jackass."

"Quite so, your Excellency. And though it grieves ME to have to confess
that he is my uncle, what am I to do with him?"

Yet this was not altogether the truth. What would have been a far harder
thing for Chichikov to have confessed was the fact that he possessed no
uncles at all.

"I beg of you, your Excellency," he went on, "to hand me over those,
those--"

"Those dead souls, eh? Why, in return for the jest I will give you some
land as well. Yes, you can take the whole graveyard if you like. Ha, ha,
ha! The old man! Ha, ha, ha! WHAT a fool he'll look! Ha, ha, ha!"

And once more the General's guffaws went ringing through the house.

[At this point there is a long hiatus in the original.]

CHAPTER III

"If Colonel Koshkarev should turn out to be as mad as the last one it
is a bad look-out," said Chichikov to himself on opening his eyes amid
fields and open country--everything else having disappeared save the
vault of heaven and a couple of low-lying clouds.