don, I can't describe to you what came over him. I thought there was
a fire, by heavens! He jumped from his seat and dashed his chair to the
floor with all his might. Alexander of Macedon was a hero, no doubt; but
why smash the chairs? There will be a deficit in the accounts, just as
the result of that.

_Superintendent_--Yes, he is hasty! I have remarked on it to him several
times. He says, "What would you have? I would sacrifice my life for
science."

_Chief_--Yes, such is the incomprehensible decree of fate: a learned man
is always a drunkard, or else he makes faces that would scare the very
saints.

_Superintendent_--God forbid that he should inspect the educational
institutions. Everybody meddles and tries to show everybody else that he
is a learned man.

_Chief_--That would be nothing: that cursed incognito! All of a sudden
you hear--"Ah, here you are, my little dears! And who," says he, "is the
Judge here?"--"Lyapkin-Tyapkin."--"And who is the Superintendent of the
Hospital?"--"Zemlyanika!" That's the worst of it!

_Enter_ Postmaster

_Chief_---Well, how do you feel, Ivan Kusmitch?

_Postmaster_--How do I feel? How do _you_ feel, Anton Anton'itch?

_Chief_--How do I feel? I'm not afraid; and yet I am,--a little. The
merchants and citizens cause me some anxiety. They say I have been hard
with them; but God knows, if I have ever taken anything from them it was
not out of malice. I even think [_takes him by the arm and leads him
aside_]--I even think there may be a sort of complaint against me. Why,
in fact, is the Inspector coming to us? Listen, Ivan Kusmitch: why can't
you--for our common good, you know--open every letter which passes
through your office, going or coming, and read it, to see whether it
contains a complaint or is simply correspondence? If it does not, then
you can seal it up again. Besides, you could even deliver the letter
unsealed.

_Postmaster_--I know, I know. You can't tell me anything about that; I
always do it, not out of circumspection but out of curiosity: I'm deadly
fond of knowing what is going on in the world. It's very interesting
reading, I can tell you! It is a real treat to read some letters: they
contain such descriptions of occurrences, and they're so
improving--better than the Moscow News.

[The play proceeds: two men, the town busybodies, happen to
find at the inn a traveler who has been living on credit and
going nowhere for two weeks. The landlo