not speaking now of the well-bred
Americans, but of that portion which would with us be considered as on a
par with the middle class of shop-keepers; for I had a very extensive
acquaintance. My amusement was, to make some comparison between the two
countries, which I knew would immediately bring on the conflict I
desired; and not without danger, for I sometimes expected, in the ardour
of their patriotism, to meet with the fate of Orpheus.

I soon found that the more I granted, the more they demanded; and that
the best way was never to grant any thing. I was once in a room full of
the softer sex, chiefly girls, of all ages; when the mamma of a portion
of them, who was sitting on the sofa, as we mentioned steam, said, "Well
now, Captain, you will allow that we are a-head of you there."

"No," replied I, "quite the contrary. Our steam-boats go all over the
world--your's are afraid to leave the rivers."

"Well now, Captain, I suppose you'll allow America is a bit bigger
country than England?"

"It's rather broader--but, if I recollect right, it's not quite so
long."

"Why, Captain!"

"Well, only look at the map."

"Why, isn't the Mississippi a bigger river than you have in England?"

"Bigger? Pooh! haven't we got the Thames?"

"The Thames? why that's no river at all."

"Isn't it? Just look at the map, and measure them."

"Well, now, Captain, I tell you what, you call your Britain, the
Mistress of the seas, yet we whipped you well, and you know that."

"Oh! yes--you refer to the Shannon and Chesapeake, don't you?"

"No! not that time, because Lawrence was drunk, they say; but didn't we
_whip_ you well at New Orleans?"

"No, you didn't."

"No? oh, Captain!"

"I say you did not.--If your people had come out from behind their
cotton bales and sugar casks, we'd have knocked you all into a cocked
hat; but they wouldn't come out, so we walked away in disgust."

"Now, Captain, that's romancing--that won't do." Here the little ones
joined in the cry, "We did beat you, and you know it." And, hauling me
into the centre of the room, they joined hands in a circle, and danced
round me, singing:

"Yankee doodle is a tune,
Which is nation handy.
All the British ran away
At Yankee doodle dandy."

I shall conclude by stating that this feeling, call it patriotism, or
what you please, is so strongly implanted in the bosom of the American
by education and association, that wherever, or whenever, the nat