he marriage
was contracted in a moment of misunderstanding, she mistaking an
exhibition of jealousy for indifference. This was her only mistake;
which she wants to correct now that she understands that it was not
right to sacrifice the man she loved to the man she looked upon with
indifference; nobody but those who will not see can call her bad or a
hypocrite."
There was as much fiction as truth in what I was saying. I knew my
aunt would never agree to the theory that the will ends when love
steps in; but I said it to impress Aniela with the idea that there was
no doubt about it. That first lover was also an invention of my own,
to make the story more to the point. But I was perfectly sincere when
speaking about the rights and duties springing from feeling. It is
quite another thing that I might not stand up for this theory if it
did not suit me just then; but man is always subjective, especially
the man who has doubted all objective truths.
I stood up for myself, and should have been foolish to speak against
my own interest. I counted that this kind of reasoning would hasten
the evolution of her soul, encourage her, and finally justify her in
her own eyes. Considering her great sensitiveness, I thought some of
it would take root. She understood me perfectly, and I could see that
every word thrilled her nerves; her color came and went; she put her
hands to her burning face to cool it. At last, when I had ceased
speaking, she replied:--
"Everything may be proved in some way or other; but when we do wrong
our conscience tells us, 'It is wrong, wrong!' and nothing can
convince it to the contrary."
Young Chwastowski must have thought Aniela wanting in philosophical
development, and as to myself I had a sensation like that, for
instance, when a weapon comes into contact with a stone wall. Aniela's
reply, in its simplicity and dogmatism, brought to naught all my
arguments. For if the principle that the will ends where love steps in
might be open to doubt, there is no doubt whatever that where dogma
begins reasoning ceases. Women generally, and Polish women especially,
agree with logic as long as it does not bring them into danger. At the
approach of danger they shelter themselves behind the fortifications
of simple faith and catechismal truth, which strong feeling might
force to surrender, but reasoning, never. It is their weakness, and at
the same time their strength. In consequence of this their power of
reasoning
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