me. I dared not linger.
Tossing back the pillows, I stumbled from the place. Why I was not heard
by my young mistress, I do not know; her ears were deaf, just as my eyes
were half-blind. In a half hour I was dancing with the maids, telling
them of the pretty stranger with whom I had been sitting out an hour of
fun in a quiet corner. They believed me, and not a particle of suspicion
has any man ever had of me since.
But others have had to suffer, and that has made hell of my nights. I
restored the ring to my poor mistress; but even that brought harm to one
I had no quarrel with. But he has escaped conviction; and if I thought
Mr. Ranelagh would also escape, I might have courage to live out my
miserable life, and seek to make amends in the way she would have me.
But I fear for him; I fear for Miss Carmel. Never could I testify in
another trial which threatened her peace of mind. I see that, instead of
being the selfish stealer of her sister's happiness, as I had thought,
she is an angel from whom all future suffering should be kept.
This is my way of sparing her. Perhaps it will help her sister to forgive
me when we meet in the world to which I am now going.
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