Paris 1904.

"I have painted a portrait of myself, grinning from ear to ear, which
you probably would not like, but it is the best I think I have done.
It was for the Salon with Julien's great approval but it was refused
with eight thousand other masterpieces. It is a fearful blow to me
but salutary for my soul no doubt and this being my holy week I am
going to try to benefit from the disappointment and chagrin. I must
go and study now. I am doing 5 hours a day of concentrated study."

"I am having an attack of 'anti.' I am getting to feel further and
further away. I like Denmark. I am very much interested in the
country, the people, the language. I think the difference between
countries, the national characteristics so curious. This is such a
beautiful place. It grows upon me more and more. The park is lovely
with deer, hares and pheasants all around."

Paris, 1904.

"I go to the dispensaire every morning. I have got so much into it
that I cannot get out. I enjoy it so much that I only remember once
in a great while that I am be doing a little good in it as well.
This war makes me feel terribly unhappy for many reasons, I cannot
explain. I have an unreasoning longing to be in Russia and doing
something. It seems such a useless ridiculous war and so much loss.
I cannot understand the way people view things. The loss of life and
suffering just make me sick. I see no dignity or sense in anything
but quiet and peace. The more importance one attaches to a question,
the more pitiful and absurd it seems. What matters externally?"

Paris 1904.

"I feel old and addled. I am still dispensing with rage and interest.
I was given a number of girls to give an illustration lesson in
bandaging this morning. We have had a number of interesting cases
lately. I shall be sorry to leave them."

(She was 26 years old, working at the French dispensary.)

Paris 1904.

"I have always before undertaken too much and accomplished less. I do
not think it is what one studies but the way one studies anything
which amounts to anything. As I have often said before, I have more
faith in what I think in spite of myself, in the preferences that I
discover in myself, than in those things which I consciously
investigate. About the affections, I don't know. The affections I
have seem stable enough to me and I feel an ultimate capacity for a
larger order."

After completing her Red Cross studies in Paris and receiving a
diploma which grante