that others, admonished by their example,
might be the more afraid to offend."

I believe that at that moment I fell on my knees, but nothing
remains very distinctly in my recollection, except that soon
the solemn curse of God was pronounced on unrepenting sinners,
and as each awful denunciation was slowly uttered, there rose
from the aisles, from the galleries, from each nook and each
comer of the house of prayer, the loud cry of self-condemning
acknowledgment.

Again, again, and again it sounded, and died away. Once more
it rose and fell; and then the voice from the pulpit
proclaimed, "Cursed is he that smiteth his neighbour
secretly;" and that time I did not hear the voice of the
multitude respond. I heard a low deep _amen_ uttered at my
side; and that amen was to me as a sentence of eternal
condemnation. I fainted, and when I recovered my senses, I was
in the vestry with my aunt, and the doctor of the village.
Soon I was able to walk to the carriage, and to drive home
with Mrs. Middleton.

When I saw Edward again, his manner was gentle and
affectionate; and I was myself so wearied with emotion, so
exhausted with hopes and fears, that I had grown calm from
mere fatigue. I was more determined than ever not to marry
Edward, and this resolution gave me a kind of melancholy
tranquillity, which allowed me to speak to him with more
self-possession than before. I had also a vague idea that, by
making this one great sacrifice, I should entitle myself to
seek the consolations of religion, after which my soul
yearned, especially since the terror which that day's service
had struck into my heart; but still I shrunk from the one act
which would have given me real peace; as I put into words the
account I could give of Julia's death; I fancied I saw before
me Edward's countenance, stern in condemnation; or over-coming
with difficulty its expression of horror and dismay; or, worse
still, incredulous, perhaps, and unable to believe that where
there was not crime, there could have been such concealment;
as I pictured to myself all this, and foresaw the nameless
sufferings of such an hour, the cry of my soul still was,
"Never, never, will I marry him! but _never_, also, will I own
to him the secret which would make him turn from me with
disgust and horror."

We were to set out for London at an early hour the next
morning, and before we parted for the night, Edward followed
me to the music-room, where I was putting by some b