left the pianoforte and went into
the next room.

I will not minutely record the details of our proceedings, or
of the various alternations of hopes and fears which agitated
me during the next few days. Sometimes when Edward spoke to
me, his voice had a tone, his eyes an expression, which made
me forget for an instant everything but what I heard in that
tone and read in those eyes; and the ecstacy of such moments
made the contrast darker and bitterer each time, when, under
the influence of my secret misgivings, or of my jealous pangs,
that flash of transient joy gave way before the gloom which
suddenly succeeded it. Mrs. Middleton had taught me to tear
away the veil from my own thoughts and feelings--to be true to
myself, and merciless to my own illusions; and therefore,
though I could sometimes read love in Edward's eyes,--though I
could see, that when an expression of strong feeling escaped
me, it awoke emotion in his soul, and struck a chord which
vibrated to the touch; I could also see the struggle which he
made to master and repress these feelings. I saw well his deep
appreciation of the pure and unsullied truth of Rosa's
character. When her eyes were fixed upon him with the bold
simplicity and innocent daring of one

"Who feared no danger, for she knew no sin,"

I have seen him turn to me with an earnest gaze of thoughtful
inquiry, which I dared not meet but by a mute appeal for
mercy. I had heard him murmur in a low voice one evening, in
which storms of jealous anger and gloomy abstraction had swept
over my soul and clouded my brow, I heard him murmur, as
Rosa's joyous laugh reached our ears,

"O, blest with temper, whose unclouded ray
Can make to-morrow cheerful as to-day!"

I had heard this, and yet I did not hate her. No, God be
praised, and I bless him for it! not all my sufferings, not
all my faults, not even the tortures of jealousy itself, have
robbed me of that one pure emotion, that one spontaneous
impulse--instinctive homage to what is pure, admiration of
what is good. But how I envied her the privilege of truth! how
bitterly I contrasted her fate with mine! when, one day, I saw
her snatch up her little sister to her knees, while Mr.
Escourt was asserting that there was no one who would
willingly consent to lay open their thoughts to another, and
devouring her with kisses, exclaim, "Now, Minny, you know I
should not mind if you could read every one of my thoughts."

At the outset