swer unless he be of so
persevering a disposition as to be determined to take the fort by
siege; or unless the "no" was so undecided in its tone as to give some
hope of finding true the poet's words:

"He gave them but one tongue to say us, 'Nay,'
And two fond eyes to grant."

On the gentleman's part, a decided refusal should be received as
calmly as possible, and his resolve should be in no way to annoy the
cause of all his pain. If mere indifference be or seem to be the
origin of the refusal, he may, after a suitable length of time, press
his suit once more; but if an avowed or evident preference for
another be the reason, it becomes imperative that he should at once
withdraw from the field. Any reason that the lady may, in her
compassion, see fit to give him as cause for her refusal, should ever
remain his inviolable secret.

[Illustration: SOCIAL PASTIME ON RETURN VOYAGE.]

[Illustration: DECLINED WITH REGRETS.]

As whatever grows has its natural period for maturing, so has love. At
engagement you have merely selected, so that your familiarity should
be only intellectual, not affectional. You are yet more acquaintances
than companions. As sun changes from midnight darkness into noonday
brilliancy, and heats, lights up, and warms _gradually_, and as summer
"lingers in the lap of spring;" so marriage should dally in the lap of
courtship. Nature's adolescence of love should never be crowded into a
premature marriage. The more personal, the more impatient it is; yet
to establish its Platonic aspect takes more time than is usually given
it; so that undue haste puts it upon the carnal plane, which soon
cloys, then disgusts.

Unbecoming Haste.

Coyness and modesty always accompany female love, which involuntarily
shrink from close masculine contact until its mental phase is
sufficiently developed to overrule the antagonistic intimacies of
marriage.

Besides, why curtail the luxuries of courtship? Should haste to enjoy
the lusciousness of summer engulf the delights of spring? The
pleasures of courtship are unsurpassed throughout life, and quite too
great to be curtailed by hurrying marriage. And enhancing or
diminishing them redoubles or curtails those of marriage a hundredfold
more. A happy courtship promotes conjugal felicity more than anything
else whatever. A lady, asked why she didn't marry, since she had so
many making love to her, replied: "Because being courted is too great
a luxury to be s