angements,
her competitions, stratagems,--her fuss, her jewels, silks, satins and
feathers, that a nervous-headache preceded a typhus fever, and the
unfortunate lady was forced to retire from the field of her glory at the
end of the third week, entirely prostrated; and poor Jonas Fitzfaddle
out of pocket--more or less--_five hundred dollars!_ The last we heard
of Fitzfaddle, he was apostrophizing the good old times when he rejoiced
in five old chairs--cook stove--slap-jacks, &c.!

Putting Me on a Platform!

Human nature doubtless has a great many weak points, and no few bipeds
have a great itching after notoriety and fame. Fame, I am credibly
informed, is not unlike a greased pig, always hard chased, but too
eternal slippery for every body to hold on to! I have never cared a
tinker's curse for glory myself; the satisfaction of getting quietly
along, while in pursuit of bread, comfort and knowledge, has sufficed to
engross my individual attention; but I've often "had my joke" by
observing the various grand dashes made by cords of folks, from snob to
nob, patrician to plebeian, in their gyrations to form a circle, in
which they might be the centre pin! This desire, or feeling, is a part
and parcel of human nature; you will observe it every where--among the
dusky and man-eating citizens of the Fejee Islands--the dog-eating
population of China--the beef-eaters of England, and their descendants,
ye _Yankoos_ of the new world; all, all have a tendency for lionization.

This very _innocent_ pastime finds a great many supporters, too;
toadyism is the main prop that sustains and exalteth the vain glory of
man; if you can only get a _toady_--the _more_ the better--you can the
sooner and firmer fix your digits upon the greased pig of fame; but as
thrift must always follow fawning, or toadyism, it is most essentially
necessary that you be possessed of a greater or lesser quantity of the
goods and chattels of this world, or some kind of tangible effects, to
grease the wheels of your emollient supporters; otherwise you will soon
find all your air-built castles, dignity and glory, dissolve into mere
gas, and your stern in the gravel immediately.

Such is the pursuit of glory, and such its supporters, their gas and
human weakness. I have said that I never sought distinction, but I have
had it thrust upon me more than once, and the last effort of the kind
was so particularly _salubrious_, that I must relate to you,
_confiden