fore?" says the interrogator, nudging a
friend, and winking at the rest.

"_What?_ Me been in Washington before? Ha, ha! _me_ been _there_ before!
Bless you, me _been_ in Washington city!"

"Oho! ha, ha!" says the interrogator, "you're one of the caucus folks,
eh? One of them wire pullers we read about, eh?"

"_Me?_ Caucus? Ha, ha! Mum's the word, gents, (looking killingly
cunning.) Come, gentlemen, let's fill up. Ha, ha! me pulling the--ha,
ha! Well, here's to the old Constitution; let's hang by her, while
there's a--a--a button on Jabe's coat."

And they all responded, of course, to this eloquent sentiment.

"Here's to Jabe's buttons, coat, hat, and breeches."

"Excuse me," continued the first operator, after the toast was wet down,
"you'll please excuse me, in behalf of some of my friends here; as
you've been down in that dratted place, and must know a good deal of the
goings on there, I'd like to inquire about a few things we Western folks
don't more than get an inkling of, through the papers."

"Certainly; go on, sir," says the victim, assuming all the dignity and
depth of a man that's appealed to to settle a ponderous matter.

"I'd like to inquire if those Kitchen Cabinet disclosures of the
Pennsylvania Senator, were true. Had you ever any means of satisfying
yourself that there is, or was, a real service of gold in the
President's house?"

"Aye! that's what we'd all like to know," says another.

"How many pieces were there?"

"_What_ were they?"

"Aye, and what their _heft_ was?"

"Mum, gentlemen; let's drink--no tales out of school, ha, ha! No,
no--mum's the word." And looking funny and deep, merry and wise, all at
one and the same time, the man of all talk proposed to drink and
keep---- _mum_.

But they wouldn't drink, and insisted on the secret being let out--they
wanted a decided and positive answer, from a man who knew the ropes.

"Gentlemen," said the victim, dropping his voice into a sort of
melo-dramatic stage whisper, and stooping quite over the table, so as to
collect the several heads and ears as close into a phalanx as possible:
"gentlemen, it's a _fact!_"

"What?" says the party.

"All gold!" says the victim.

"A gold service?" inquires the party.

"_Thirty-eight pieces!_" continued the victim.

"Solid gold?" chimed the rest.

"_Just half a ton in heft!_"

"You don't tell us _that_?"

"Know it; eat out of 'em, _then weighed 'em all!_"

"P-h-e-w!" whistled some, while o