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The Project Gutenberg EBook of Marge Askinforit, by Barry Pain This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net Title: Marge Askinforit Author: Barry Pain Release Date: July 11, 2008 [EBook #26024] Language: English Character set encoding: ASCII *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MARGE ASKINFORIT *** Produced by D Alexander and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive) MARGE ASKINFORIT BY BARRY PAIN NEW YORK DUFFIELD AND COMPANY 1921 CONTENTS AUTHOR'S NOTE 7 I. THE CATASTROPHIC FAMILY 9 II. EBULLIENT YOUTH 18 III. GLADSTONE--LLOYD GEORGE--INMEMORISON--DR. BENGER HORLICK 26 IV. THE SOLES 40 V. MISFIRES 50 VI. TESTIMONIALS--ROYAL APPRECIATION 64 VII. SELF-ESTIMATE 78 LATE EXTRA 83 "And every week you opened your hoard Of truthful and tasteful tales-- How you sat on the knees of the Laureate Lord, How you danced with the Prince of Wales-- And we knew that the Sunday Times had scored In Literature and Sales." _To Margot in Heaven._ BY CLARENCE G. HENNESSY (circa 1985). AUTHOR'S NOTE This book was suggested by the reading of some extracts from the autobiography of a brilliant lady who had much to tell us about a number of interesting people. There was a quality in that autobiography which seemed to demand parody, and no doubt the autobiographer who cannot wait for posterity and perspective will pardon a little contemporary distortion. In adding my humble wreath to the flatteries--in their sincerest form--which she has already received, I should like to point out that a parody of an autobiography should not be a caricature of the people biographed--some of whom must already have suffered enough. I have lowered the social key of
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