the original considerably, not only to bring
it within the compass of the executant, but also to make a distinction.
I have increased the remoteness from real life--which was sometimes
appreciable in the original--to such an extent that it should be
impossible to suppose that any of the grotesques of the parody is
intended for anybody in real life. Nobody in the parody is intended to
be a representation, or even a misrepresentation, of any real person
living or dead. For instance, Inmemorison is not intended to be a
caricature of Tennyson, but the passage which deals with him is intended
to parody some of the stuff that has been written about Tennyson.

No doubt the author of the original has opened to the public several
doors through which it is not thinkable that a parodist would care to
follow her. Apart from that, parody should be brief, just as
autobiography should be long--_ars brevis, vita longa_.

BARRY PAIN.
_October_ 8, 1920.

_The quotations are from the articles which appeared in "The Sunday
Times." It does not of course follow that these passages will appear in
the same form, or will appear at all, when the complete autobiography is
published._

MARGE ASKINFORIT

FIRST EXTRACT

THE CATASTROPHIC FAMILY

I was christened Margarine, of course, but in my own circle I have
always been known as Marge. The name is, I am informed, derived from the
Latin word _margo_, meaning the limit. I have always tried to live right
up to it.

We were a very numerous family, and I can find space for biographical
details of only a few of the more important. I must keep room for
myself.

My elder sister, Casein--Casey, as we always called her--was supposed to
be the most like myself, and was less bucked about it than one would
have expected. I never made any mistake myself as to which was which. I
had not her beautiful lustrous eyes, but neither had she my wonderful
cheek. She had not my intelligence. Nor had she my priceless gift for
uttering an unimportant personal opinion as if it were the final verdict
of posterity with the black cap on. We were devoted to one another, and
many a time have I owed my position as temporary parlour-maid in an
unsuspicious family to the excellent character that she had written for
me.

She married Moses Morgenstein, a naturalized British subject, who showed
his love for his adopted country by trading as Stanley Harcourt. He was
a striking