over when he felt the icicle
going over his bare stummick, and he said, 'For God's sake, gentlemen,
what does this mean? I am not dead.'"

"The other boys looked at Pa with astonishment, and I said 'Well, we
bought you for dead, and the coroner's jury said you were dead, and by
the eternal we ain't going to be fooled out of a corpse when we buy
one, are we Doc?' My chum said not if he knowed his self, and the other
students said, 'Of course he is dead. He thinks he is alive, but he died
day before yesterday, fell dead on the street, and his folks said he had
been a nuisance and they wouldn't claim the corpse, and we bought it
at the morgue. Then I drew the icicle across him again, and I said, 'I
don't know about this, doctor. I find that blood follows the scalpel as
I cut through the cuticle. Hand me the blood sponge please.' Pa began to
wiggle around, and we looked at him, and my chum raised his eye-lid, and
looked solemn, and Pa said, 'Hold on, gentlemen. Don't cut into me any
more, and I can explain this matter. This is all a mistake. I was only
drunk.' We went in a corner and whispered, and Pa kept talking all the
time. He said if we would postpone the hog killing he could send and get
witnesses to prove that he was not dead, but that he was a respectable
citizen, and had a family. After we held a consultation I went to Pa
and told him that what he said about being alive might possibly be true,
though we had our doubts. We had found such cases before in our practice
east, where men seemed to be alive, but it was only temporary. Before
we had got them cut up they were dead enough for all practical purposes.
Then I laid the icicle across Pa's abdomen, and went on to tell him
that even if he was alive it would be better for him to play that he
was dead, because he was such a nuisance to his family that they did not
want him, and I was telling him that I had heard that in his lifetime he
was very cruel to his boy, a bright little fellow who was at the head
of his class in Sunday school and a pet wherever he was known, when Pa
interrupted me and said, 'Doctor, please take that carving knife off
my stomach, for it makes me nervous. As for that boy of mine, he is the
condemndest little whelp in town, and he isn't no pet anywhere. Now, you
let up on this dissectin' business, and I will make it all right with
you.' We held another consultation and then I told Pa that we did not
feel that it was doing justice to society to gi