re he obtained his Liver and Macaroni paved with
Cheese, he met the daughter of the Household. When there was a Rush
she would sometimes put on all of her Rings and help wait on the Table,
although her Star Specialty was to get the Stool at the right Elevation
and tear the Vital Organs out of "Pansy Blossom" and "White Wings."

The young Shipping Clerk used to fly to his Kennel and get himself all
Gussied up and then edge into the Parlor and turn the Music for Miss
Livingstone, who looked to him like Lily Langtry and sounded like
Adelina Patti.

They went to Housekeeping in a stingy Flat with a Bed that could be
stood on End during the Daytime and made to resemble a Book-Case, also
a Plaster-of-Paris Lion on the Mantel.

About the time Gordon was first tethered on the Fire-Escape, the
Provider got a Taste of Soft Collateral and began to wear Gold
Bracelets on his Cigars.

When Ethel was large enough to take into the Park, the Graft had
developed until the whole Outfit moved to an Apartment where Goods had
to be delivered in the Rear. Mother began to use Hacks which were
not numbered.

So they went along for Years, riding on L Trains, calling up the
Janitor to ask for more Heat, trying to find a good Maid, and
experimenting with new Cereals, all of these Romantic Adventures
combining to make what is known as City Life.

They were simply four scrambling Units in the Great Ant-Hill; four
tiny Tadpoles in the great Schools that wiggled up and down the main
Thoroughfares. It seemed that their only Chance to make an Impression
on the huge and callous City was to die and then hold up a line of
Street Cars while the Hearse and the five Carriages moved slowly in
the direction of Calvary.

But Destiny had them spotted.

Father was very busy trying to run a Shoe String up to a National Bank.
He would rush into his Office and open the Desk and push Buttons and
send Hurry-Up Wires and dictate Letters to trembling Myrtle with the
Small Waist and keep People waiting outside, just like the Whales who
control the Sugar Trust.

He had a Front like the new Pennsylvania Station and the soft Personal
Attributes of a Numidian Lion.

When he was sued in the Courts by a Victim who wanted a final look at
his Money, the Reporters came around and he was so stiff-necked and
defiant that all of them referred to him as the Millionaire Promoter.

It was easier to be this kind of a Millionaire than stand for a Search.
Every Office Bu