o play a trick upon them.

[Illustration: A FLAT-IRON WEDDING]

The fact, however, is that the hardware store in the place had an
overstock of flatirons and sold them at an absurdly low figure, and
Potts' guests unanimously went for the cheapest thing they could
find, as people always do on such occasions. Potts thinks he will not
celebrate his "silver wedding."

CHAPTER XIII.

_THE RACES, AND SOME OTHER THINGS_.

There was some horse-racing over at the Blank course one day last
fall, and Butterwick attended to witness it. On his way home in the
cars in the afternoon he encountered Rev. Dr. Dox, a clergyman who
knows no more about horse-racing than a Pawnee knows about psychology.
Butterwick, however, took for granted, in his usual way, that the
doctor was familiar with the subject; and taking a seat beside him, he
remarked loudly--for the doctor is deaf--

"I was out at the Blank course to-day to see Longfellow."

"Indeed! Was he there? Where did you say he was?"

"Why, over here at the course. I saw him and General Harney, and a
lot more of 'em. He run against General Harney, and it created a big
excitement, too; but he beat the general badly, and the way the crowd
cheered him was wonderful. They say that a good deal of money changed
hands. The fact is I had a small bet upon the general myself."

"You don't mean to say that Longfellow actually _beat_ General
Harney?"

"Yes, I do! Beat him the worst kind. You'd hardly've thought it, now,
would you? I was never more surprised in my life. What's queer about
it is that he seemed just as fresh afterward as before he commenced.
Didn't faze him a bit. Why, instead of wanting to rest, he was jumping
about just as lively; and when the crowd began to push around him, he
kicked a boy in the back and doubled him all up--nearly killed him.
Oh, he's wicked! I wouldn't trust him as far as I could see him."

"This is simply astonishing," said the doctor. "I wouldn't have
believed it possible. Are you _sure_ it was Longfellow, Mr.
Butterwick?"

"Why, certainly, of course; I've seen him often before. And after
breathing a while, he and Maggie Mitchell came out, and as soon as
they stepped off he put on an extra spurt or two and led her by a neck
all around the place, and she came in puffing and blowing, and nearly
exhausted. I never took much stock in her, anyway."

"Led her by the neck! Why, this is the most scandalous conduct I ever
heard of. Mr. Butterwick,