thus exhibited as an "old scarecrow" to his own eyes, he had cause for
apprehension in one of the mysterious menaces addressed to him. The
threat of perpetual Purgatory, a Protestant old gentleman might despise;
but that of martyrdom by being made the frightfullest tomartyr upon the
top of his own door steps, is a substantial horror. It is suggestive of
an idea dreadful enough to make him tremble over his bit of fish, and
shudder in the enjoyment of his mutton-chop--the idea of being pounded
and crushed into a pulp, and ground by Popish organ-grinders to the
consistence of tomartyr sauce.

* * * * *

THEOCRACY OF RUSSIA.

The Russians have been hitherto supposed to belong to the Greek Church;
but there now appears to be some doubt of this. It was lately stated, in
the foreign correspondence of some of our contemporaries, that after a
recent review of his troops by Prince Gortschakoff, the General issued
an order of the day, in which he told the army of occupation that they
were called upon to annihilate Paganism, concluding his address with
"Long live the CZAR! Long live the God of the RUSSIANS!" If PRINCE
GORTSCHAKOFF is to be taken as a correct exponent of Muscovite divinity,
the religion of the Russians must be identical with that of the YEZIDI,
inasmuch as the latter, also, are worshippers of the old gentleman
denominated NICHOLAS.

* * * * *

"FAST" LITERATURE.

A sporting "gent," who has courageously entered the "lists" at several
betting-houses, has lately purchased an elaborate work on "Ethnology,"
in consequence of his having heard that it will give him much
information on the subject of "races."

* * * * *

A NEW MOTTO FOR RUSSIA.--Bear and Overbear.

* * * * *

OUR BEAUTIFUL FASHIONS OF THE PRESENT DAY.

Our beautiful fashions go on improving! Like Buckingham Palace, they are
constantly being altered, and never altered for the better. What the
human _facade_ will be ultimately, there's no knowing. Everything has
been tried in the shape of flowers, feathers, ornaments on the top, and,
in some instances, paint, that could possibly disfigure it. Let these
disfigurements only continue, and they may have the effect of converting
the human head into a kind of MEDUSA'S, that will turn into stone all
who look at it. One of the latest absurdities is the way in which ladies
wear the