but
once he was fairly provoked to do so, by the confused blundering way in
which one of them was trying to instil a notion of what he meant into
the minds of the jury. "I am sorry to interfere, Mr. ----," said the
judge, "but do you not think that, by introducing a little order into
your narrative, you might possibly render yourself a trifle more
intelligible? It may be my fault that I cannot follow you--I know that
my brain is getting old and dilapidated; but I should like to stipulate
for some sort of order. There are plenty of them. There is the
chronological, the botanical, the metaphysical, the geographical--even
the alphabetical order would be better than no order at all."
* * * * *
Baron Thomson, of the Court of Exchequer, was asked how he got on in his
Court with the business, when he sat between Chief Baron Macdonald and
Baron Graham. He replied, "What between snuff-box on one side, and
chatterbox on the other, we get on pretty well!"
Sir Richard Bethel, Lord Westbury, and Lord Campbell were on very
friendly terms. An amusing story is told of a meeting of the two in
Westminster Hall, when the first rumour of Lord Campbell's appointment
as Lord Chancellor was current. The day being cold for the time of the
year, Lord Campbell had gone down to the House of Lords in a fur coat,
and Bethel, observing this, pretended not to recognise him. Thereupon
Campbell came up to him and said: "Mr. Attorney, don't you know me?"--"I
beg your pardon, my lord," was the reply. "I mistook you for the _Great
Seal_."
[Illustration: RICHARD BETHEL, BARON WESTBURY, LORD CHANCELLOR.]
Lord Cranworth, Vice-Chancellor, after hearing Sir Richard Bethel's
argument in an appeal, said he "would turn the matter over in his mind."
Sir Richard turning to his junior with his usual bland calm utterance
said: "Take a note of that; his honour says he will turn it over in what
he is pleased to call his mind."
Sir James Scarlett, Lord Abinger, had to examine a witness whose
evidence would be somewhat dangerous unless he was thrown off his guard
and "rattled." The witness in question--an influential man, whose
vulnerable point was said to be his self-esteem--was ushered into the
box, a portly overdressed person, beaming with self-assurance. Looking
him over for a few minutes without saying a word Sir James opened fire:
"Mr. Tompkins, I believe?"--"Yes."--"You are a stockbroker, I believe,
are you not?"--"I ha
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