y to the coach windows. The old woman manifestly was
but ill at ease. At last, unable to restrain her terror, she faltered
out, "Oh dear; oh dear, sir! what can the cows mean?"--"Faith, my good
woman," replied Curran, "as there's an Irishman in the coach, I
shouldn't wonder if they were on the outlook for _a bull_!"

Curran was once asked what an Irish gentleman, just arrived in England,
could mean by perpetually putting out his tongue. "I suppose," replied
the wit, "he's trying _to catch the English accent_."

During the temporary separation of Lord Avonmore and Curran, Egan
espoused the judge's imaginary quarrel so bitterly that a duel was the
consequence. The parties met, and on the ground Egan complained that the
disparity in their sizes gave his antagonist a manifest advantage. "I
might as well fire at a razor's edge as at him," said Egan, "and he may
hit me as easily as a turf-stack."--"I'll tell you what, Mr. Egan,"
replied Curran; "I wish to take no advantage of you--let my _size_ be
_chalked_ out upon your side, and I am quite content that every shot
which hits outside that mark should _go for nothing_." And in another
duel, in which his opponent was a major who had taken offence at some
remark the eminent counsel had made about him in Court, the major asked
Curran to fire first. "No," replied Curran, "I am here on your
invitation, so you must _open the ball_."

Sir Thomas Furton, who was a respectable speaker, but certainly nothing
more, affected once to discuss the subject of eloquence with Curran,
assuming an equality by no means palatable to the latter. Curran
happening to mention, as a peculiarity of his, that he could not speak
above a quarter of an hour without requiring something to moisten his
lips, Sir Thomas, pursuing his comparisons, declared _he_ had the
advantage in that respect. "I spoke," said he, "the other night in the
Commons for five hours on the Nabob of Oude, and never felt in the least
thirsty."--"It is very remarkable, indeed," replied Curran, "for
everyone agrees that was the _driest_ speech of the session."

Lord Clare (says Mr. Hayward) had a favourite dog which was permitted to
follow him to the Bench. One day, during an argument of Curran's, the
Chancellor turned aside and began to fondle the dog, with the obvious
view of intimating inattention or disregard. The counsel stopped; the
judge looked up: "I beg your pardon," continued Curran, "I thought your
lordship had been in consu