were anything but gay,
As sadly he was grinding
At a meikle multiplepoinding,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae banter frae Lord Deas,
Nae promises o' fees
That never will be paid afore the judgment-day,
Nae lies dubbed "information,"
From the worst rogues in the nation,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae haveral wutty witness,
Displaying his unfitness,
Tae see some sma' distinction 'tween a trial and a play,
Nae witness primed at lunch
Wi' perjuries and punch,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae laughing-gas orations,
Nae treading on the patience
Of Judges and of Juries, who will let you say your say,
Yet pay but sma' attention
To the gems of your invention,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae mair delightful wondering
At a new man blandly blundering,
Nae kind hints from the Court that he's gangin far astray,
Nae flowery depictions
In the teeth of ten convictions,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae whacking ten years' sentence,
Wi' advices o' repentance,
And learn in years of leisure to admire the "law's delay."
Nae fell female fury,
Blackguarding Judge and Jury,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nay grey auld woman sobbing,
Nae mair you'll catch her robbing,
And a' the Christian virtues henceforth she will display,
If the Judge will but have mercy
(For the sixteenth time I daresay),--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae processions, nae pageants,
Nae pawky country agents,
Nae macers, nae trumpeters, wi' tipsy blare and bray,
Nae Councillors or Bailie,
Or Provost smiling gaily,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae funny cross-examining,
Nae jurymen begammoning,
Nae laughter from the audience, nae gallery's hurrah,
Nae fleeching for acquittal,
Though you don't care a spittle,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae playing _hocus-pocus_
With the _tempus_ and the _locus_,
Nae pleas in mitigation (a kittle job are they),
Nae bonny rapes and reivings,
Nae forgeries and thievings,--
The days o' my Circuits are a' fled away.

Nae dinners wi' the Judges,
Nae drooning a' your