what the state
of the constitution will be after my death as what it is now.

13. Let this, then, be laid down as the first law of friendship, that
_we should ask from friends, and do for friends', only what is good_.
But do not let us wait to be asked either: let there be ever an eager
readiness, and an absence of hesitation. Let us have the courage to give
advice with candour. In friendship, let the influence of friends who
give good advice be paramount; and let this influence be used to enforce
advice not only in plain-spoken terms, but sometimes, if the case
demands it, with sharpness; and when so used, let it be obeyed.

I give you these rules because I believe that some wonderful opinions
are entertained by certain persons who have, I am told, a reputation for
wisdom in Greece. There is nothing in the world, by the way, beyond the
reach of their sophistry. Well, some of them teach that we should avoid
very close friendships, for fear that one man should have to endure the
anxieties of several. Each man, say they, has enough and to spare on his
own hands; it is too bad to be involved in the cares of other people.
The wisest course is to hold the reins of friendship as loose as
possible; you can then tighten or slacken them at your will. For the
first condition of a happy life is freedom from care, which no one's
mind can enjoy if it has to travail, so to speak, for others besides
itself. Another sect, I am told, gives vent to opinions still less
generous. I briefly touched on this subject just now. They affirm that
friendships should be sought solely for the sake of the assistance they
give, and not at all from motives of feeling and affection; and that
therefore just in proportion as a man's power and means of support are
lowest, he is most eager to gain friendships: thence it comes that weak
women seek the support of friendship more than men, the poor more than
the rich, the unfortunate rather than those esteemed prosperous. What
noble philosophy! You might just as well take the sun out of the sky as
friendship from life; for the immortal gods have given us nothing better
or more delightful.

But let us examine the two doctrines. What is the value of this
"freedom from care"? It is very tempting at first sight, but in practice
it has in many cases to be put on one side. For there is no business
and no course of action demanded from us by our honour which you can
consistently decline, or lay aside when begun, f