the extinction of the Billing Family...."--_Daily
Telegraph_.

A correspondent, writing upon House of Commons' notepaper, assures us
that the above passage is a gross exaggeration.

* * * * *

"Charlie D. (Westminster).--We answer you in the words of
Cassius, 'A plague of both your houses.'"--_Town Topics_.

Were not the words those of _Mercutio_ when he had failed to set up a
Business Government in Verona?

* * * * *

"Apply weed-killers to garden walks and drives, using every
precaution against domestic fowls and other bird-eating
worms."--_Irish Gardening_.

Very careless of St. Patrick to leave these ornithophagous reptiles at
large.

* * * * *

"Wanted, Few Men to travel with Hobby Horses.--Apply Murphy's
Steam Galloping Horses, Abbeyleix, Queen's Co."--_Irish
Independent_.

Now we understand Mr. Ginnell's sudden decision to quit Westminster.

* * * * *

THE TAP-ROOM.

Our Reserve Battalion has a billiard-room, which is well patronised
by all those cheerful souls who have escaped from France without
permanent injury and resignedly await the second call.

To-night the "Tap-room" is in top form. A four-handed game of snooker
is in as rapid progress as is reasonably possible. Every easy-chair
is filled with a would-be player offering gratuitous advice in order
to speed things up. A young war-scarred Captain is balanced on a
rickety side-table, offering odds on the game in a raucous voice.
The Mess-waiter strives to be in three places at once. Through all,
the players, totally unnerved, play with a desperate attempt at
concentration.

Suddenly the door opens, and the Colonel enters, heated and out of
breath. His eye pierces through the tobacco smoke and transfixes the
unhappy bookmaker. He requests him to take advantage of his position
to open a window. The players examine the tips of their cues in sudden
silence. The Colonel refuses the offer of six vacated chairs with a
slightly impatient negative and inquires as to the probable length
of the game. He accepts the obvious untruth that it has just ended,
smiles with satisfaction, and proposes to the Adjutant a game of one
hundred up.

The Colonel, after examining the cues with marked disapproval,
eventually selects one of short length and pronounced weight. He
then appropriates for his sol