The Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 100.,
Jan. 10, 1891, by Various

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Title: Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 100., Jan. 10, 1891

Author: Various

Release Date: July 19, 2004 [EBook #12951]

Language: English

Character set encoding: ASCII

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PUNCH,

OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

VOL. 100.

January 10, 1891.

MR. PUNCH'S PRIZE NOVELS.

NO. X.--THE FONDMAN.

(_BY CALLED ABEL, AUTHOR OF "THE TEAMSTER."_)

[The eminent Author writes to us as follows:--"How's this for
a Saga? Do you know what a Saga is? Nor do I, but this is one
in spite of what anybody may say. History be blowed! Who cares
about history? Mix up your dates and your incidents, and fill
up with any amount of simple human passions. Then you'll get
a Saga? After that you can write a Proem and an Epilogue. They
must have absolutely nothing to do with the story, but you can
put in some Northern legends, and a tale about MAHOMET (by the
way, I've written a play about him) which are bound to tell,
though, of course, you were not bound to tell them. Ha, ha!
who talked about thunderstorms, and passions, and powers and
emotions, and sulphur-mines, and heartless Governors, and
wicked brothers? Read on, my bonny boy. _Vous m'en direz des
nouvelles_, but don't call this a novel. It's a right-down
regular Saga."--C.A.]

THE BOOK OF STIFFUN ORRORS.

CHAPTER I.

[Illustration: The Characters Personally-Conducted by the Author to
Reykjavik.]

STIFFUN ORRORS was a gigantic fair-haired man, whose muscles were like
the great gnarled round heads of a beech-tree. When a man possesses
that particular shape of muscle he is sure to be a hard nut to crack.
And so poor PATRICKSEN found him, merely getting his own wretched back
broken for his trouble. GORGON GORGONSEN Was Governor of Iceland, and
lived at Reykjavik, the capital, which was not only little and hungry,
but was also a creeping settlement with a face turned to America. It
was a poor lame place, w