stling, "God save the King," "The British Grenadiers," and "See, the
conquering hero comes." The first of these tunes I once commenced in the
churchyard, during a funeral service; for which I got the sexton's cane
over my back; "that being no place," as the said sexton judiciously
remarked, "to show my loyalty in." Even the old women in the parish
could not pass me without a military salute, such as "Heads up, missis!"
"Eyes right, missis!" "Keep the step, missis!" &c. These pranks often
brought me into disgrace and trouble, and usually ended with an
application of the end of my master's whip.

In the dreary month of December, when the white snow danced along the
glen, and the icicle sparkled on the hoary oak, I had transported my
frozen limbs into a turnip field, close by the Great Yarmouth road,
where I stood shrivelled up like a dried mushroom, plotting and planning
how to escape from the truly wretched situation in which I felt myself
to be then placed. I had just put my cold fingers into my mouth, for
the purpose of warming them, and had given them the first puff, when I
heard the distant sound of martial music. Down went my hands, and up
went my heels. I made an _echellon_ movement towards the place; jumped
over the gate; brought up my right shoulder a little; then gave the word
"Forward," and marched in double quick time. The music soon got nearer;
or, at all events, I soon got so near to the music that I was glad to
halt. Just at this moment the whole band struck up "Over the hills, and
far away," which kindled a flame in my bosom which nothing but death can
extinguish, though I have now long since had my full share of the
reality of the Scotch melody. On coming up to the party of soldiers, I
gave the colonel a military salute, by first slapping my leathers, then
bringing up my right hand (which, by the by, was the wrong hand) to my
forehead, and extending the thumb as far as I could from my fingers. I
continued in this position, keeping my elbow parallel with the top of my
head, until the colonel came close up to me; and, remarking how
studiously I retained the same position, condescendingly said, with a
smile, "That's a fine fellow." On this head I perfectly agreed with the
gallant commandant, as may be readily supposed; and the compliment so
elated me, that I felt by no means certain whether I stood on my head or
my heels; but ran about, first in the front, then in the rear, until at
last I ran bump up against