who,
though otherwise a man of good understanding, did not show his good
sense in the education of his daughters temper. "He had," says Lord
Kames, "three comely daughters, between twelve and sixteen, and to
inure them to bear disappointments, he would propose to make a visit
which he knew would delight them. The coach was bespoke, and the young
ladies, completely armed for conquest, were ready to take their seats.
But, behold! their father had changed his mind. This, indeed, was a
disappointment; but as it appeared to proceed from whim, or caprice,
it might sour their temper, instead of improving it."[43]

But why should a visit be made a matter of such mighty consequence to
girls? Why should it be a disappointment to stay at home? And why
should Lord Kames advise that disappointments should _be made to
appear_ the effects of chance? This method of making things appear to
be what they are not, we cannot too often reprobate; it will not have
better success in the education of the temper, than in the management
of the understanding; it would ruin the one or the other, or both:
even when promises are made with perfect good faith to young people,
the state of suspense which they create, is not serviceable to the
temper, and it is extremely difficult to promise proper rewards.[44]
The celebrated Serena surely established her reputation for good
temper, without any very severe trials. Our standard of female
excellence, is evidently changed since the days of Griselda; but we
are inclined to think, that even in these degenerate days, public
amusements would not fill the female imagination, if they were not
early represented as such charming things, such great rewards to
girls, by their imprudent friends.

The temper depends much upon the understanding; and whenever we give
our pupils, whether male or female, false ideas of pleasure, we
prepare for them innumerable causes of discontent. "You ought to be
above such things! You ought not to let yourself be vexed by such
trifles!" are common expressions, which do not immediately change the
irritated person's feelings. You must alter the habits of thinking;
you must change the view of the object, before you can alter the
feelings. Suppose a girl has, from the conversation of all her
acquaintance, learned to imagine that there is some vast pleasure in
going to a masquerade; it is in vain to tell her, in the moment that
she is disappointed about her masquerade dress, that "it is a