HES'NUT TREE."]

* * * * *

ODDS BOBBILI!

(_The Rajah of Bobbili arrived by P.& O. at Marseilles, where he
was received by Col. Humphrey on behalf of the Queen._)

There was a gay Rajah of Bobbili
Who felt when a steamer on wobblely,
"Delighted," says he,
"Colonel HUMPHREY to see,"
So they dined and they drank hobby-nobbeley.

* * * * *

IS THE _TIMES_ ALSO AMONG THE PUNSTERS?--In its masterly, or rather
school-masterly, article last Saturday, on "The Divisions on the
Home-Rule Bill," written with the special intention of whipping up the
Unionist absentees, the _Times_ said, "There is an opinion that, with
a measure so far-reaching in its character as the Home-Rule Bill,
pairing should be resorted to as sparingly as possible." The eye
gifted with a three-thousand-joke-search-light power sees the pun at
once, and reproduces it italicised, to be read aloud, thus--"_Pairing_
should be resorted to _as pairingly_ as possible." What shall he have
who makes a pun in the _Times_? Our congratulations. Henceforth, to
the jest-detectors this new development may prove most interesting.

* * * * *

IMPERIAL INSTITUTE NOTICE AT THE RECEPTION.--"Guests must retain
their wraps and _Head Coverings_." Evidently no bald men admitted.

* * * * *

AUSTRALIAN SONG IN MINOR KEY FOR ANY NUMBER OF VOICES.
--"_I Know a Bank!_"

* * * * *

A BUSINESS LETTER.

["Marriage is daily becoming a more commercial affair."
--_A Society Paper._]

DEAR FRED,--Your favour of the 3rd,
Has had my very best attention,
But yet I cannot, in a word,
Accept you on the terms you mention;
Indeed, wherever you may try,
According to the last advices
You'll meet, I fear, the same reply--
"It can't be done, at current prices!"

In vain an ancient name you show,
In vain for intellect are noted,
Blue blood and brains, you surely know,
At nominal amounts are quoted;
And then, I see, you're weak enough
To offer "love, sincere, unstudied,"--
Why, Sir, with such Quixotic stuff
The market's absolutely flooded!

But--every day this fact confirms--
The time is over for romances,
And whether we can come to terms
Depends alone on your finances.
So, would you think me over-bold
If I, with deference, requ