some people study Esperanto!

We also make ourselves useful. "K(1)" contains members of every craft.
If the pig-sty door is broken, a carpenter is forthcoming to mend it.
Somebody's elbow goes through a pane of glass in the farm-kitchen:
straightway a glazier materialises from the nearest platoon, and puts
in another. The ancestral eight-day clock of the household develops
internal complications; and is forthwith dismembered and reassembled,
"with punctuality, civility, and despatch," by a gentleman who until a
few short months ago had done nothing else for fifteen years.

And it was in this connection that Corporal Mucklewame stumbled on to
a rare and congenial job, and incidentally made the one joke of his
life.

One afternoon a cow, the property of Madame _la fermiere_, developed
symptoms of some serious disorder. A period of dolorous bellowing was
followed by an outburst of homicidal mania, during which "A" Company
prudently barricaded itself into the barn, the sufferer having taken
entire possession of the farmyard. Next, and finally--so rapidly did
the malady run its course--a state of coma intervened; and finally the
cow, collapsing upon the doorstep of the Officers' Mess, breathed her
last before any one could be found to point out to her the liberty she
was taking.

It was decided to hold a _post-mortem_--firstly, to ascertain the
cause of death; secondly, because it is easier to remove a dead cow
after dissection than before. Madame therefore announced her intention
of sending for the butcher, and was upon the point of doing so when
Corporal Mucklewame, in whose heart, at the spectacle of the stark and
lifeless corpse, ancient and romantic memories were stirring--it may
be remembered that before answering to the call of "K(1)" Mucklewame
had followed the calling of butcher's assistant at Wishaw--volunteered
for the job. His services were cordially accepted by thrifty Madame;
and the Corporal, surrounded by a silent and admiring crowd, set to
work.

The officers, leaving the Junior Subaltern in charge, went with one
accord for a long country walk.

Half an hour later Mucklewame arrived at the seat of the deceased
animal's trouble--the seat of most of the troubles of mankind--its
stomach. After a brief investigation, he produced therefrom a small
bag of nails, recently missed from the vicinity of a cook-house in
course of construction in the corner of the yard.

Abandoning the role of surgical expert f