in.

Dr. Faustus

Doctor Faustus was a good man,
He whipt his scholars now and then.
When he did he made them dance
Out of Scotland into France;
Out of France into Spain,
And then he whipped them back again.

If! If! If!

If all the would was apple pie,
And all the seas were ink,
And all the trees were bread and cheese,
What would we have to drink?
It's enough to make an old man
Scratch his head and think.

Funny Men

Alderman Absolute Always Adjudicated with Astonishing Ability
After he had read some books from Cole's Book Arcade.

Benjamin Bouncer Banged a Brown Bear with a Blunderbuss,
In a lane at the back of Cole's Book Arcade.

Christopher Crabstick was Cross, Captious, Cutting, and Caustic,
Whenever he could not get a book brought from Cole's Book Arcade.

Francis Fizgig Ferociously Fought and Frightened a Fiddler,
At midday, right in front of Cole's Book Arcade.

Gregory Gimcrack Grinned and Gaped at the Geese and Ganders
Exposed for sale in the Eastern Market, just above Cole's Book
Arcade.

Horatio Headstrong Hurled a Hatchet at the Head of a Hawk
Which sat on top of Cole's Book Arcade.

Isaac Ichabod Inhabited an Isolated and Inhospitable Indian Island,
At an enormous and disheartening distance from Cole's Book Arcade.

Lugubrious Longface Loved Learning and Literary Lore,
Which he always got out of the books he bought at Cole's Book
Arcade.

Marmaduke Meddlesome Munificently Meted out Mercy to a Miserable
Man
Who stole a book at Cole's Book Arcade.

Obadiah Orpheus Opened an Original Overture Outrageously Oddly,
With a small whistle and a big drum, in front of Cole's Book
Arcade.

Quinton Querulous Queerly Questioned a Quibbling and Querulous
Quidnunc,
And asked Quizzingly if he had ever seen the inside of Cole's Book
Arcade.

Reuben Ramble Ran a Ridiculous Rattling Race on a Railway,
And beat the train in hasting to get a book at Cole's Book Arcade.

Theodore Thunderbolt Told Terrible and Tremendous Tales of
Travelling,
Which were afterwards printed in books and sold at Cole's Book
Arcade.

Valentine Valiana Valorously Vanquished a Vapouring Villager,
Who spoke ignorantly and slightingly of Cole's Book Arcade.

Xenophon Xenocles eXhibited eXtraordinary and eXcessive
eXcitability
Whenever he was not calmed down by books from Cole's Book Arcade.

Young Yokel, a Youthful