it
and tell what it was. Mr. Aldrich took it up like a thing of life, and
gazed upon it as though trying to recall something to his mind.
Placing his finger, the one with the diamond ring on, to his corrugated
forehead, he paused for a moment and finally gave his opinion that
they were life preservers. He said that in Boston all women wore them,
especially when they were out on excursions, or picnics. "See," says
he, as he hefted it, and made an indentation in it, which resumed its
natural position as soon as he took his finger off, "it is filled with
wind. Now, in case of accident, that would float a woman on top of water
until she could be rescued. Let us demonstrate this matter by putting
it on Mr. Boyington, of the _Sentinel_, and taking him to the morgue
and placing him in the bath tub and he proceeded to fasten the life
preserver around the calf of Mr. Boyington's leg.

"Say, where are you putting it?" says Mr. B., as he struggled to keep
from laughing right out. "You fellows don't know as much as Thompson's
colt. If I know my own heart, and I think I do, a life preserver goes on
under the vest."

Mr. Aldrich said he didn't pretend to know any more than anybody else.
All he knew about these things personally was that he had seen them
hanging up in stores, for sale, and one day when he was shopping he
asked one of the lady clerks what it was hanging up there, and she said
it was a life preserver, and asked him if he wanted one, and he told her
no, he was only inquiring for a friend of his, who rode a bicycle. He
didn't know but it might be something that went with a bicycle.

All the time this discussion was going on we sat by the safe in the
police office. We never were so sorry for a lot of innocent young men,
never. The girl looked at us and winked, as much as to say, "Old man,
why do you not come to the rescue of these young hoodlums, who don't
know what they are talking about, and take the conceit out of them," and
so we explained to them, in the best language we could command, the uses
and abuses of the garment they were examining, and showed them how it
went on, and how the invention of it filled a want long felt by our
American people. They all admitted that we were right, and that it was
a counterfeit well calculated to deceive, and we believe now that the
woman was convicted of counterfeiting mainly on the testimony of
the reporters. However that may be, we desire to impress upon the
authorities the im