poising tidalwave. Higher and higher, until its crest,
unbalanced, toppled forward to engulf its tormentors.
Then the unruffled advance resumed, again some resource was interposed
against it, again it was checked for an instant and again it overcame
its adversary, careless of obstacles, impartially taking to itself gouty
roominghouses and pimping frenchprovincial ("17 master bedrooms")
chateaus, hotdogstand and Brown Derby, cornergrocery and pyramidal
foodmart; undeterred by anything in its path.
When you say a clump of weed attacked a city you utter an absurdity. I
think everyone was aware of the fantastic discrepancy between statement
of the event and the event itself. So innocent and ridiculous the grass
looked as it made its first tentative thrust at the urban nerves; the
green blades sloped forward like some prettily arranged but
unimaginative corsage upon the concrete bosom of the street. You could
not believe those fragile seeming strands would resist the impress of a
careless boot, much less the entire arsenal of military and agricultural
implements. It must have been this deceptive fragility which broke the
spirit of so many people.
From an item in the _Intelligencer_ I recalled the existence of one of
Mrs Dinkman's neighbors who had rudely refused the opportunity to have
his lawn treated with the Metamorphizer. He had left an incoherent
suicidenote: "Pigeons in the grass alas. Too many pigeons, too much
grass. Pigeons are doves, but Noah expressed a raven. Contradiction
lies. Roses are red, violets are blue. The grass is green and I am thru.
Too too too. Darling kiddies." He then, in full view of the helpless
weedfighters, marched on into the grass and was lost to sight.
In the days following, so many selfdestructions succeeded this one that
the grass became known in the papers as the Green Horror. Perhaps a
peculiar sidelight on human oddity was revealed in most of these
suicides choosing to immolate themselves, not in the main body of the
grass, but in one of the many smaller nuclei springing up in close
proximity.
It was my fortune to witness the confluence of two of these descendant
bodies. They had come into being only a few blocks apart; understandably
their true character was unrecognized until they were out of control and
had enveloped the neighborhoods of their origin. They crept toward each
other with a sort of incestuous attraction until mere yards separated
them; they paused skittishly,
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