t!" I exclaimed, "did they get me a waitress after all?"

She smirked. "They've sent a man this time. A footman 'e was before the
War, but since 'e's been demobbed 'e's been out of a job. That's 'ow it is
'e's takin' temporary work and----"

"He seems to have told you quite a lot about himself already," I
interposed.

She smirked again. "I 'adn't been talkin' to him ten minutes before 'e
asked me wot was my night out. 'E isn't 'arf a one."

"It seems he isn't," I agreed. And I sent up a silent prayer of
thankfulness to Heaven and the Domestic Bureau. "But what about the
amalgamated boilermaker?"

"Oh, 'im!" She tossed her head. "'E can go to--Manchester."

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Lady_ (_tendering half-crown_). "I'M _SO_ SORRY, I HAVEN'T
A PENNY."

_Conductor._ "DON'T YOU WORRY, MISS--YOU'LL SOON 'AVE TWENTY-NINE."]

* * * * *

A Legacy of the War.

No one will lightly forget the noble services rendered by the Y.W.C.A. to
our troops and those of our Allies during the War, and many of Mr. Punch's
friends must have given practical expression to their gratitude. But we are
liable to forget that the end of the War has not brought an end either to
the work of the Y.W.C.A. or to the claim which that work has upon our
recognition. There is pressing need of accommodation and protection and
healthy environment for the large army of girls who have been demobilized
and are now engaged in, or seeking for, civilian employment. The funds of
the Y.W.C.A. do not admit of the establishment and maintenance of
sufficient hostels for this good purpose. At the moment a chance is offered
to them of purchasing a large, suitable and perfectly-equipped
house--rented during the War, and after, by the Y.W.C.A.--in a
densely-populated district in South London. The offer holds good for only a
few days, and, if it is not taken, over two hundred girls will be turned
adrift to wander in search of lodgings. The price is thirty thousand
pounds. It is difficult to think of any cause to which money could be more
usefully subscribed. Mr. Punch begs his readers to send to the promoters of
this good work some token of their sympathy and appreciation. Gifts should
be addressed to the Hon. Emily Kinnaird, 4, Duke Street, W.1.

* * * * *

"UNITED STATES AND ARMENIA.

It would be grossly misleading to say that Congress, in its present
frame