been very kind to me. No, it ain't that at all, sir; but I don't
believe in the Church of England no more, that's all.'

"'You don't believe any more...? What don't you believe? What do
_you_ know about beliefs and dogmas?'

"'Why, sir, lots o' things,' I says. 'F'r instance, there's the
bishops; I don't 'old with their way of livin', sir.'

"'By Jove, sergeant-major, do you hear this damned idiot? He doesn't
hold with the bishops' way of living! May I ask, Brommit, where you
have had occasion to observe the ways of bishops?'

"'Well, sir, Wesley was a splendid fellow ...' An' off I starts to
spit out everythink my girl 'ad managed to get 'old of, without
lettin' 'im put in a word. You bet 'e'd 'ad enough of it after five
minutes. 'E'd 'ave liked to shut me up, but 'e couldn't do that
without grantin' me wot I was askin' for. There was no flies on
_my_ conversion, I can tell you; I 'ad real live scruples; I'd
been thinkin' too much. You can't punish a chap becos 'e thinks
too much.

"The old man knew 'is job as well as I knew mine. 'E saw at once 'e
only 'ad one thing to do.

"'All right,' 'e said. 'After all, it's your own affair, my man.
Sergeant-major, put him down as a Wesleyan. Brommit, you will come
back to my room on Friday evening, and meanwhile I will arrange
matters with the Wesleyan minister so that you can attend the
services. You know where he lives, of course?'

"'No, sir, I don't know 'im.'

"'That's rather strange. Well, never mind, I'll find him. Come back
on Friday, Brommit.'

"Slippery old Bill! 'E knew a thing or two, 'e did! Next Friday
evenin', when I went up to 'im, 'e says:

"'Ah! I've settled everything,' says 'e. 'I've seen the Wesleyan
minister, the Rev. Mr. Short. A charming man, Mr. Short. It's settled
with him that you're to go to chapel on Sunday mornings at nine and
on Sunday evenings at six. Yes, there are two services; Wesleyans are
very strict. Of course if by any chance you miss a service, Mr. Short
is sure to let me know, and I would take the necessary steps. But
there's no need to think of that, is there? A man who takes the
trouble to change his religion at the age of thirty is hardly likely
to miss a service. So that's all right, Brommit.'

"Oh, damn cute 'e was, was Slippery Bill! Next Sunday off I goes to
the Reverend Short's chapel. Tall, lean chap 'e was, with a real
wicked face. 'E gave us an awful sermon all about 'ow we were to
reform our lives, an' about a